Oversoul

Name:  Oversoul
Element: Yin
Rank: B/A/S
Specialty: Space-Time
Particular Jutsu Type:
Backstory: The Kamigawa has powerful inner spirits. While their personas are embodiments of those same inner spirits-- this takes the technique further by allowing the user to not just call on that same inner strength-- but manifest it within their bodies. This allows the caster to embody and transform into the Persona themselves-- or a variation of it, depending on their intent. The caster may use this to enhance their physical abilities, becoming an avatar for the excellent power dwelling in their souls. It is so strong, at high ranks-- it can even warp reality around it to achieve the impossible.

Appearance:

B-Rank demi-form/weapon example:

A-Rank example of torso  example:

S-Rank Full Body-Pure Blood Example:

Handseals: n/a
Duration: 2/3/4
Cooldown: Posts Used +2 (+3 for Transplant users)
Range: Describe Below
Power: 40/60/Chakra
Speed: 40/60/Chakra
Health: 40/60/Chakra
Stat Boosts: n/a
What it does:
The Oversoul is a gigantic manifestation of the user's inner soul, resulting in an avatar made from the user's chakra. It is triggered by the caster calling out "Persona" or "Oversoul." This aura manifests in a humanoid/beast shape, surrounds them, and fights on their behalf. It is one of the most potent abilities for those who mastered the Uchugan, rivaling the "Susanoo." The aura surrounds the caster at jutsu speed-- and manifests in different ways, depending on its rank and image imagined upon casting, but acts by the caster's will, acting and attacking their behalf. Unlike "Persona," the caster and astral body are anchored to one another-- as in its lesser forms, it will move with the caster. The construct itself will suspend the user in its more complete state. This technique acts as a means of attack and armor for the caster-- their inner strength is manifested as a physical force to protect them. Its effects range via the rank used.

B-Rank:  When active, the user may only manifest a part of the Oversoul's form-- a head, an arm, or some minor extremity out from the user's body as a brief flash. If used as a defensive mechanism, it can only block frontal attacks up to the jutsu's power to cover a defensive space of 3 meters max. Once per post, paying 25 AP can be used as a ranged attack to launch one element the user possesses that reaches 15 meters, 1 meter wide & high in the form of a beam or sphere. If the caster wishes, either by request or if desired, they can use it to craft their Oversoul into the shape of a sword or weapon (reaching a maximum of 1 meter at most) for melee combat. This weapon's health and power are equal to this jutsu's stats. The projection will shatter and enter cooldown should the Oversoul get overpowered by a stronger jutsu.

A-Rank: At A-Rank, the user's Oversoul becomes more developed, becoming a more materialized and tangible form of the caster's Persona-- or inner being. The manifestation of the oversoul becomes a torso-sized avatar, surrounding or coming out from behind the caster. Surrounded by its aura, the Oversoul acts as a 360-defensive armor, allowing it to block attacks from all around equal to this jutsu's health. The size of the oversoul-being can be anything the caster picks upon being conjured and can reach a maximum size of 35 meters tall and 25 meters wide, with limbs that can reach 17 long for melee attacks. Like before,  once per post, by paying 25 AP, the ability to use one of the caster's elements or non-elemental in the form of an attack at the cost of paying activation cost instead of upkeep cost. The blast reaches as far as 30 meters, 15 meters wide & high in the form of a beam or sphere. The movement of the body also is equal to jutsu speed. The caster can use this jutsu to protect allies, allowing up to 2 extra people to be inside the Oversoul. The projection will shatter and enter cooldown should the Oversoul get overpowered by a stronger jutsu.

S-Rank: At S-Rank, the caster's Oversoul becomes complete-- a fully realized incarnate of the user's true inner self or representation. They become fully embodied in their Persona and merge with it temporarily to draw out its full power. At this rank, the Oversoul can reach a full-body form, becoming as large as 50 meters tall and 20 meters wide, its limbs going a maximum of 25 meters. Melee attacks or weaponry said Oversoul possesses can only do damage equal to this jutsu's power. The caster is located within the head of the oversoul or the torso-- in its core as the caster has control over where to enter. Like before, once per post, by paying 25 AP, you can use one of the caster's elements or non-elemental in the form of an attack. The blast reaches as far as 50 meters, 10 meters wide & high in the form of a beam or sphere. The oversoul, when active, can be used to protect allies, allowing up to 3 extra people to be inside the Oversoul as well.

Regardless of rank-- the caster can freely use any of these altered forms from the previous rank at its current rank's stats so long as its AP cost is paid and upkeep.

If the user has the "Pureblood" skill, their Oversoul can fly equal to jutsu speed. Further, with Pureblood at Rank-S, the caster is fully synchronized with the Oversoul. Using it at this rank makes them invisible as a 'core' as before—a perfect transformation.



Character Specific: n/a
Wordcount to learn: 1500/2500/5000
Action Cost: 30/50/100. Upkeep: 15/25/50
Mastery: no
Bonus Requirements: Must have both: Uchugan" active. Additionally,  S rank versions require Rank 4 of Doujutsu functional to use. You must also know "Persona."
Canon, Custom, Bloodline, or Village Exclusive: Bloodline

Howdy, so sorry for the wait

So at first glance, 

"Strength and Speed checks made against the caster while this is active become equal to the power of this Jutsu."
>So, I believe what you're trying to say is that any strength or speed checks made against the caster are instead checked against the power of this jutsu, which I am not comfortable with in the slightest. Turbo boosting a single stat should not provide exemption from three different checks. I would like to see this aspect removed entirely. 

B Rank
>I would like clarification on if the part summoned is able to be summoned anywhere, or if the user can only summon the part to its corresponding part. Examples being having to summon the head of the oversoul as a helmet and the arm as a gauntlet, or summon the head of the oversoul on the end of an arm to use like a gauntlet.
>I would remove the phrase "brief flash". I understand the aesthetic you're going for, but the wording makes it seem like it barely lasts a single post.
>The sword being listed in a different unit of measurement also reads oddly, would you be willing to reduce the sword's length to 1m?

A Rank
>If you're looking to use Susanoo's measurements, it's 35m tall and 17m limbs. At present, 25m tall and 17m limbs is a bit lopsided.

S Rank
>Limbs should only reach out to 25m, not 35m to prevent that aforementioned lopsidedness.

"Should the Oversoul get overpowered by a stronger jutsu, the caster will still take damage, but can continue to pay the upkeep to keep the Oversoul going."
>I would like this clause removed as well. If it gets overpowered, it should break and go on cooldown.

"Regardless of rank-- the caster can freely use any of these altered forms from the previous rank at its current rank's stats"
>Please clarify that the AP cost is proportional to the stats. If you use S rank stats, you have to pay S rank costs.

>I would prefer that pureblood only give either the ability to fly or the extra post of duration, not both concurrently.

>So for the element attack bit, I'd like further dimensions clarified. 15/30/50m reach, 1/5/10m width, but what shape does it take, how tall is it?

"This Oversoul avatar may also be used as a medium to channel the caster's jutsu as well, giving new options for combat."
"Like the other rank, this jutsu can be used as a medium to channel other jutsu through the Oversoul."
>What is meant by these lines? What type of jutsu can be cast through this?

At present, this is already a Susanoo level armor that can be vaguely used as a medium and also fire a laser beam of an undetermined element that scales with rank, all without the need for handseals. So quite honestly, I would rather you pick either the laser beam or the jutsu medium and then scrap the other aspect or app it as a different jutsu.

As always, feel free to get a second opinion if you disagree on any of the points I've mentioned.

Thanks

Hi there, so I will be responding to each topic in order---

As for the stat check part, I am sorry for that. It didn't occure to me but Oversoul overtakes the body so thought it be a logical choice. I will remove it immediately.

B rank part: Ideally its a representation of the Oversoul-- and like the picture, it can change in shape. For example, the pictures one showed a sword, or the other showed a koropokor representation of the ainu. It can be symbolic or a corresponding part as you suggest. For me, say if if I used mine it be the head of a dragon upon my arm to act as shield or means of attack.
I will remove the phrase, and How about the the size of the oversoul for B rank to be no bigger than 1 meter then?

A Rank Part: Will make changes to dimensions. Thank you.

S Rank : The following is responce to all the stuff below I'd like to discuss first.

The overpowered part should it take damage, ideally yes it should be destroyed , but I'd like the option to have either for a bonus effect if at least once in battle, the caster can still take damage but still hold or reconstruct the Oversoul? Allowing an extra chance to fight in that state. I never liked how Susanoo can get easily overshot. I'm open to suggestions to work with this.

As for flight vs. extended duration, well, I do want the duration to last longer. Pureblood should have exclusive effects to this and still want that. but I rather not choose between them. Are there any other options?

"This Oversoul avatar may also be used as a medium to channel the caster's jutsu as well, giving new options for combat."
"Like the other rank, this jutsu can be used as a medium to channel other jutsu through the Oversoul."
>What is meant by these lines? What type of jutsu can be cast through this?

To answer this part, i want the caster to be able to access their ninjutsu, other techniques while in this state. Like example how Madara could use ninjutsu while inside his-- or in this idea, that while the caster does hand signs-- the avatar could say launch it from its hands. Following example: Zeo casts Suiton Giant Cyclone: The avatar raises its arms and launch it from its hands, or use a giant-version rasengan. Point is, I want the caster to be able tto use their attacks with the avatar as a proxi. Hell, even the avatar could do hand seals if need be?

But now i seen what you said about the medium vs elemental blast. If the above part is okay-- then i will choose the medium method, but then it may make the lesser form of Oversoul-- B rank specifically a bit slower. Can that be an exception to that part?

Anyway ty for your feedback and fixed waht i could.

You want to reduce the range of B rank to 1m as opposed to 3m? If you would like to, feel free, but I don't want to make the defensive aspect unviable.

I'll discuss with staff and get back to you on the breaking upon being overpowered part, but I'll let you know that I lean towards No. My reasoning is stated below.

This is already very busy as it is, so I personally will not be budging on choosing between flight or extended duration. Particularly if we keep the bit about being able to tank a hit and not go on cooldown. Imagine being on the other side of this technique, using your strongest jutsu to try to break it, but then the Kamigawa shrugs off the hit, flies around, shoots elemental laser beams, and also has a longer than normal duration. 

For the reasons mentioned above, I do not believe the construct should additionally be allowed to be able to cast techniques that are supersized. That leads to a whole mess of dimension specifications. My general assumption would be that the user can still use jutsu while in the state, but it's going to be a hard no on making one's arsenal have the potential to be massively expanded to such a degree. For this point, my suggestion would be a separate amplifier that can only be used in Oversoul state that is specifically designed for such a task, therefore giving it a hard cost and cooldown without further overloading this app.

Also please see my comment left on the Persona app, as I would like a similar clause added to this technique.

Thanks

@komori

Writing to let you know after a while I have made the changes request. Got rid of extra duration for flight and got rid of mediumship but hope base attacks and elements is still okay.

Let me know of any other needed changes. Thank you

All the requests Komori has requested seem to have been made.


Overall, both of you have done a great job. But there are a couple of things I would love to see before we can approve.

For the elemental attack, please add an AP cost.
Dimensions too, is it shaped like a sphere, a cone, a cylinder?

—> The caster can use this jutsu to protect allies, allowing up to 3 extra people to be inside the Oversoul as well.

I understand this is something that Oversoul armor intends to do. 
However, you have placed this right after the elemental attack of Oversoul. The way this is worded is that the attack protects the allies. And selective targeting is not a viable feature for this packed creation.

Please clarify that or change its order in the text.

Ayato, thank you for reviewing my jutsu and I have made the changes. please take another look