Instant Travel to Suna-ish area

Ramon had gotten out of THAT whole situation. No reason to think back on that meeting, though. He was off to the land of wind. The plants that grew there were of a different variety than those of any other location he had been to, and he expected a good deal of them were poisonous. Testt subject would likely be more difficult to find, but that didn't matter. What was he going to do there? Screw around and maybe learn some more interesting things.

But first he would have to get there. Which meant a lot of traveling. A long time by common practice. He could make it significantly shorter if he rode the river though… It WAS going remarkably fast right now, and would significantly cut down his travel time, He figured he might as well use it to travel between towns and just stop at the towns for rest at night. Or during the day. Really whenever it was that he got tired. So it was with this thought that, instead of heading straight for the land of wind that Ramon took a detour to the river. It really was only about an hour out of the way through the forest, but in the long run it would save him a significant amount of time. He hopped up into the trees and was on his way, moving as fast as he could. Birds chirped around him. The heavy downpour was over and the cold had disappeared, at least temporarily. It was actually a really nice day right now. He wouldn’t mind just taking in the sun by the riverside for a time. In fact, once he got there, he slipped off his back pack and shirt and simply laid on the sand. He didn’t really care what happened for now: no one would assume him a shinobi and his supplies were spare enough that he wouldn’t care too much if robbed He already knew what he could safely eat from this forest. So he could stand to waste some time absorbing some Vitamin D and just listening to the birds and shit. It was relaxing, but quickly became a bore. So he put his clothes and shit back on and stepped into the river. He melted into the river, being pulled along by its current. He sped past long stretches of land, much faster than he could have moved otherwise.

The sun was high in the sky casting its light over all. So it was about noon. He peeked out of the river and saw a village not too far down the way. He figured that that would make as good a place as any to get some food. He was a little tight on cash, but he could deal with it.

And then some idiots stroll into his path. “He Bert, check this out. Kid went swimming but didn’t pay the beach toll. What do you think we should do?”


“Why Ernie, I must declare, that the best action would be taking double.” The one named Bert said that in a horribly faked ‘high and mighty’ accent. It was stupid and Ramon just rolled his eyes.

“OY. BERT. THIS KID JUST ROLLED HIS EYES AT YOU!” yelled Ernie.

“OH KID THAT’S IT!” Bert yelled before charging, sword drawn. “IMMA TAKE ALL YOUR MONEY NOW!”

“Touchy little children, aren’t you?” Ramon asked, smirking. Bert got madder from the look on his face, and Ernie drew a sword himself. Ramon stepped back into the water and deftly dodged the first man’s jab. He flipped over his shoulders and made a quick kick to the general area of the man’s genitals. It would certainly hurt, of that Ramon was sure. Funnily enough as he was flipped he noticed the other man running towards him. As the one named Bert collapsed, Ramon was turning around. With a surprised look on his face, the sword passed right through his body. He reached for the blade as if to pull it out, staring at it the whole time. Then he looked at the man who had guided the sword right over where Ramon’s heart would be. And then he smiled. “Good Try.” He walked along the length of the sword, it moving down his body but leaving no marks. The man looked at him in horror. Ramon walked right into the man, at the last second becoming water and splashing to his feet. Also, in the off chance that the reader of this passage someone still had no clue how Ramon didn’t just die, here’s a hint, followed by a story. A massive hint that is larger than a megalodon: He’s a Hozuki. The story: Ramon knew the sword was coming, and simply liquefied wherever it would be. It wasn’t even hard. Had the guy now been so smug at first and so shocked when he realized Ramon wasn’t hurt, he probably would have noticed that the area around the sword was almost see through. He really was an idiot. While his friend was on the ground screaming something about “NOW I WLL NEVER HAVE KIDS” in his breaking voice. Seriously he sounded like an ‘uninformed’ fourteen year old who was just asked to have sex. It was kind of hilarious. But Ramon was paying no attention to him. Instead he was waiting for the one named Ernie to turn around looking for him. And there it was. Ernie pulled a full one hundred eighty degree turn looking for where Ramon actually was. Ernie must have assumed that he was a ninja by now, and it was commendable that that didn’t scare him away. However, Ramon had not been the water clone that Ernie was so sure explained the current situation. Ramon reformed right behind the thug and kicked him squarely in the balls. It was quite hilarious actually. Two grown men beaten up by a person who wasn’t even out of their teen years yet. And in such a hilarious way too. Ramon grabbed the swords that the two dropped. Horrible quality. Throwing them into the raging river with the rocks would dull them and dent them, rendering the two swords utterly useless. He had no use for such poor quality weapons anyways, so he just tossed them in. Afterwards, as the one named Bert was gaining his composure, Ramon kneed him right in the stomach. The guy fell over, and Ramon did a spin kick, connecting firmly with the head of Ernie. He wouldn’t die from the hit but he would see the world go black. It would probably be black for a few hours, and Ramon doubted the head ache would be fun. So before Bert could stand up again, if he even wanted to bother trying to while this more than worthy adversary was still around, Ramon bent down and took the money pouch from Ernie. Looking inside, Ramon thought one thing: I’m eating well tonight!

Of course, he spent some of the money on Ramen in the small town. Ramon eating Ramen was always somewhat funny to him. It was just this thing that existed that his name was almost identical, and he ate it. It was almost self-cannibalism. Of course that was only in the world of jokes. Ramon had never ACTUALLY taken part in self-cannibalism, or even cannibalism in general. It was just a funny concept.

Either way the Ramen was quite delicious. It had those little fish cakes and the broth was great and he all around liked the meal. It was well crafted, and exquisitely served. A lot more than Ramon expected from a small town shop like this. But he didn’t let it show. He was emotionless while eating, the only indication that he liked the food being the slurping, which could just imply that he was really hungry. He paid the man the money he owed and walked off. The town was nice. Small but nice. If Ramon ever decided to settle down, it would probably be some place like this. That was a big if, however. Ramon doubted that he would ever truly settle down, not for long anyways. He was too easily excited be what everyone else thought immoral. Such ideas were too tempting. Like the one he had now. He still had those cherry look alikes in his bag. He stopped at a stall selling cherries, and asked how much. He pulled his backpack around and bought a few dozen form the man. As the man looked away, he slipped the poisonous ones into the pile with the others. The people would be in for a bit of a rude awakening. Sure, these berries probably wouldn’t kill them but... you never know. Maybe it had simply overkilled the lizard a hundred fold. That would easily give them the potency to kill a human. No matter what, the townsfolk would have some fun in the coming days; that poor vendor in specific if the found out the source was the cherries. Once out of sight range, he melted back into the river and was on his way.

It was dusk before Ramon left the river. He had the stolen money from the two idiots and decided to spend a night in luxury the legal way: paying for a night at an inn with a hot bath. It was no hot springs, but the heated water would be a welcome reprieve from the cold river he had been in all day. The inn was very nice. They almost turned him away because of his clothing, looking tattered and still actually soaking wet. It hadn’t been a long walk from the river to here. However, he prepaid for everything and the girl running the place begrudgingly handed him a room key, while reciting the number written on the key.

After going by his room to change clothes and drop off his pack, Ramon went to the bathe rooms. The inn was unisex, so anyone could be in there. Not that Ramon really minded. Sure, he couldn’t pretend to be a girl but… that didn’t really matter. He knew enough about the body to not be embarrassed as well. Not like many people would be anyways, though. Public bathes were just a part of life. So he walked into the changing room and undressed, placing everything of his that he had brought (barely more than his clothes) into a cubby. Upon entering the room, he found he was alone. He rather liked that, meant he could truly relax and allow himself to liquefy a little. Of course first he showered, getting off any grime and filth that still managed to coat him. Afterwards, he stepped into the little tub. The inn was a small but fine one. The bathe resembled that. Marble with a direct feed that resembled a little waterfall. He presumed that all excess water drained into the river. There was also the fact that the water was heated before it reached the bathe, and kept warm while there. It was truly quite relaxing.

After he had rested for a good while in the bathe, he returned to his room. It was a sparse but nice room, perfect for a single night’s stay. He slept, and in the morning he woke. He ate and then set off for the land of wind. It wasn’t far now, and the river didn’t go there anyways. It turned and headed towards the sea. He would be on foot from here.

“AND desert” he said out loud as he entered the land of wind, his bag stocked with lots of water canisters and plenty of food and supplements.


((1914 words, instant travel completed))

Approved of the Sesame Street murderers travel.


Vendetta.