The past holds me, but I want to hold the future

The time that he had known was well past.  The ghosts of every direction where now his constant companions and they did nothing but show him what was gone.  He could not look at Akihana and not see Youka, just as he could not look at Denkitki and see his parents that he had shunned when he should have taken to them.  It was not that he wanted to have these thoughts in his mind; no it was that he couldn’t escape from them.  How did one find the strength to remove ghosts who lived….and what more that he wanted in his company……while also wishing them to disperse.  The restaurant was doing fine; his side gig of a travel agency also ran well.  He had started to turn profits, and what had been an uncomfortable poverty had extended into comfortable rural living.  Yet, was it enough.  His had contented himself with this new life, there were days he was happy, and yet too often the ghosts in his mind haunted him, which led to thoughts of going back to what he knew.  Yet what was it that he knew.  He knew bloodshed, leaving people, and pain.  Was that really what he wanted to return too………

               Regardless if it was or was not, his day started as it often did.  He had taken to early rising.  Often taking the prep job in the restaurant, he would set them on the right foot for the day.  It had become almost a joke that their head chef preferred to wash dishes and dice rather than cook anymore.  While still giving suggestions and tasting the food, he had worked hard to promote others to take over the main jobs.  The simple tasks did well enough.  Especially in the absence of his employees when he could utilize more of his skills.  While still not comfortable performing jutsu in the town, he did not worry about hiding his speed and dexterity the way he did when eyes were on him.  In a flash onions, tomatoes, potatoes and all manner of sides where diced and prepared, sealed away for their later use.  He had left a note for Den and Aki letting them know he would not be home for a day or two, that he just needed to escape for a little bit away from this place and clear his mind.  What he had not decided on if he would come back.

               His presence alone offered danger to them, and he was not confident he was willing to leave them so.  Alternatively, was it he sought the danger and did not want to drag them into more war?  Even he was not sure anymore, but the important thing was he was gone.  Packing a small bag, he left behind his armor.  It was positioned inside the restaurant, though made to appear as though a prop fitting with the shinobi theme.  He did however where his robes, and keep on him the rest of his regalia.  His mask sitting on top of his head.  A deep breath and his chakra signature seemed to vanish from any perceptive abilities.  It was not a tactic he did often, yet until he was far enough away from Den he felt it necessary.  The combination of Aki and Den possibly would come after him if they thought him in danger, and since he was not sure if it was danger he was after he wanted to make sure to not leave behind any trace.  Fiddling with the cufflinks he added to the robes their appearance would change.  No longer black and red, but instead a very plain looking outfit, his mask transformed into a bowler hat, Standard dark traveling clothes.  His hair still black, and the beard left him nearly unrecognizable as Maku Jemuzu except for those that new him.

               His pathway out of the village was an easy one, taking up a bicycle he simply rode out of town, the morning air still fresh with dew, a brisk breeze on his face.  The island of Fang country was a pleasant one at odds with its name.  He had come to even enjoy it.  Yet it was not a place for rest now.  Instead, he needed to find solitude elsewhere, and there was only one place for that.  He had one more ghost to visit.  Catching a boat to the main country, he did not find himself back on familiar ground until late in the afternoon.  From there his journey became less easy.  Ditching the bike in a shoddy constructed hiding place, he hoped it would be there when he returned, at least for that little village girl’s sake; surely, she was missing it something awful by now.  Hoisting the pack up and taking a deep breath he leaped, and felt himself running through the trees.

               His destination was one he had been to only a few times, the last time someone had nearly killed him.  This time he hoped it would prove a little less eventful, as he had plenty of work to do.  The Den of Inequity as Youka had named it was well hidden, located between snow and rock countries.  It had been ideal real estate in the beginning, a time that seemed so long ago it was as if it did not even happen.  All that was left of it was memories…and of course Maku.  The major players dead and gone, or at best missing from the world from some time, yet perhaps now as old faces reunited they would find themselves thrust back.  It was the full rest of the day by the time he made it to the cave.  The state of it just as he had left it, hidden away from the world.  No living human for miles in every direction.  Walking to the boulder, he placed a single hand on it.  Looking at the ground, he thought how odd it was that the rain fell on such a clear sky day.  “I’m home old friend…”  His voice reached out to a bundle that lie motionless, but safely tucked inside the cave.  

               The next couple of days where spent undergoing something he had not done in some time.  Real honest to god training.  He had sparred with Youka and learned from him techniques, but that was the last true bit of training he had done.  It was only now he thought about how unfocused he had been all that time.  After Echo Uchiha had died…..his own passion for progress had gone with him.  How much stronger could he have been, had he not just ridden on the coat tails of a single success.  It was a question he may never know the answer to now, and instead he found himself starting from near the bottom once again.  As he ran through the forest, sweat dripping down his brow he knew he had gotten so much slower.  He had once been able to move at speeds shinobi had thought he was using space time, and now…….he swore creatures below him kept passing him.  All the good food at the restaurant was not helping either He swore he could feel the last 4 days’ worth of meals sloshing around inside of his stomach.

               It was amazing how quickly ones physical abilities deteriorated.  Jumping out of the trees and landing before the boulder that marked the entrance to the hideout, he looked down and watched the dirt catch the sweat from his brow.  Falling down, he let himself look up at the sky.  The clouds gently drifted above.  There had been a time this level of physical exertion would have been greatly looked forward too…..what had happened to him?  He had never been a taijutsu fighter, but he had been strong, lean…something akin to a predatory cat.  Now he felt like a simple house cat waiting for his next meal.  The tone in his arms gone, his stomach a little tighter on the robes than he would have preferred, and now a simple amount of sprinting winding him.  He did not recognize this world, and he did not recognize himself in it either.  Sitting up, he closed his eyes letting his mind wander through the area around him.  Picking up on the natural energies that flowed through this place.  Youka had chosen a hideout in a perfect location, but he wondered if the man had picked it in part because of the simple splendor of it all.

               The nature chakra would soon begin to collect, and it was as if his very spirit was able to pick it out of the air, holding them close to his chest.  He enjoyed the way it felt, this quite meditation.  Connecting with the energies of the world, and letting them connect with him.  It was something that in his youth he had never focused on.  When he had begun his training it was about mastering.  He had taken chakra, the energies of the shinobi and bent it to his will.  Demanding its subservience, and becoming master.  Yet, that way had only brought him so far.  It had never been a collaboration, and it had only taken him so far.  The meditation, the affinity to the natural energies had all begun with his connection to his brother.  His brother had begun to teach him the powers behind it, but the more important lesson had likely come from teaching him not to use anything at all and just listen.  It had not come naturally, and in the beginning he had spent a lot of time just thinking with his eyes closed, but once the dam broke, it had all started to flow easier.

               “Do you think you’ll be what you where?” The voice came out of nowhere, its tone not unlike the Kyuubi that he had befriended all that time ago.  His eyes opened and darted around, but just as soon as he had the feeling, the voice had vanished.  Sighing, he closed his eyes and reconnected.  The flow of nature once again apparent, the feeling returned.  He doubted it had anything to do with the real kyuubi, but instead a latent connection of the summoning pact created.  Perhaps it was similar to the voices Youka heard, or maybe it was something different.  Regardless it felt nice to hear another familiar voice, even if he doubted its reality.  However, genjutsu had long ago taught him that reality was what one made it, more so than what one saw.  Settling back in, his mind went black, and a voice returned.  “Do you really think you’ll be where you where?” the question once again rang in his head.  It was something he had long though about.  Would he ever be as strong as he was……”That was not the question……you could be so much more….”  The voice vanished after that, even as he stayed within the meditation.

               Opening his eyes, he let out a sigh and felt the chill of wind on his face.  The sun may be warm, but the northern wind form snow country was cold.  Dusting himself off, he moved within the cave, and set forth with the second step of his mission here.  He wanted to train, to push his body and not be a liability in the event that the past came hunting again, but more than that, he wanted to get to work within the Den of Inequity.  The place was well named, both for what they’d done and what had happened to them.  Though when Youka had named it, it couldn’t have been obvious at the time.  How ironic that he now lay at rest within the place.  Cleaning it out of its defenses, and rearranging the rooms would be a hell of a feat.  Within, he looked around and remembered the familiar living arrangements.  He’d staid here before, he had his own bunk.  It was there that he slept on the first night, offering some air of familiarity.  If he closed his eyes and pretended, he could go all the way back before the world had started to change, a change that had been sparked by their own will.
               On the second day, the cleaning out of the torture chamber began.  Moving through the electrified fields and kunai launchers came with ease.  What really assisted this however was any regard for needing to be careful.  In contrast to the chill wind blowing outside, the internal chambers of the Den had become a furnace.  Standing within the outer hall, Maku looked within at his work.  Flames cackled within the room the remnants of devices and chakra controls exposed and being burned up.  Within golden flames mixed with reds and oranges, Maku’s own body covered with a golden glow that seemed to keep out any of the damaging affects the sweat therefore was from exertion more than from the actual heat.  Breaths came hard, his stomach moving to work his diaphragm to keep himself up.  It had been more taxing than he had expected, moving away from the burning torture chamber he made his way back to the exit.  Sitting with his back against the boulder, he was low enough to avoid the acrid smoke billowing overhead.  The golden glow dissipated, and his head fell to his chest, red eyes giving way to blue as the lids closed over them and sleep started.

               How long had he slept, and what dreams had come.  He saw a picnic in a far away mountain….the smell of cookies and sandwiches, with the sighing of a great beast behind him.  The rushing flow of a water garden, and then the cold winds of a village hidden in snow.  His dreams only showed the past, and yet even in this dreamlike state he couldn’t help but begin to become conscious of how much time he had spent dwelling behind him, instead of moving towards any semblance of the future.  It’s enough……..the past is gone……The voice within his mind tried to shout, but then he saw Akihana and Den and it asked him why they were still there.  If the past was gone why where they still with him, why had he not given them up like all other things………….once again his mind shouted back at the ethereal tones, Because they were never in my past.  I shut them out, its time…..to let the past die, and let them in as I should have done a long time ago…….I’ll tell them how I feel.

               “Is that what you want….to let me die?”  A voice reached out, and Maku turned only to look into a mirror.  The boy within it moved outside of the container, and he stood face to face with himself.  Except, it was not him….it was him of before.  The Maku before him was blonde, hair being flipped by the wind within the dreamscape.  His clothes outfitted in the Knightmare armor of old, a long bladed katana at his hip.  He looked stronger, his movements more fluid.  Swallowing, he could feel the intensity and the urge to kill from this other Maku……from this imposter.  “Then kill me, show me you can move on, show me my way is not the true way……see what we have done, and what we can continue to do….”  As it spoke the dreamscape changed to show all the villages, he had destroyed, except fused into one, the dead bodies of the shinobi and citizens piled high.  In the distance, a great beast thrashed and destroyed any structure standing.  He found it difficult to look at now, this red eyed stranger that he knew had once been him……and as he looked closer he saw that the shadow resembled a certain priest that lay buried not far……….”Show me this new way, is better…..”  The wicked smile, drew his eyes, and even before his eyes could adjust the boy was within a foot, the blade at his own throat…….and in a sweat he awoke.

               The dream had been so vivid, so strong and yet it had ended so abruptly.  His mind kept seeing his younger self side by side.  They were so different, and yet the chakra had been the same.  Sleep did not come easy that night, even after the pure exhaustion he had worked himself through.  He’d completely tore through the torture chamber, using his dream as fuel.  His goal was to scorch it to the ground, and start fresh.  It was going to be a room of reflection, of memories.  No longer would it hold power over others to subjugate them, but instead free them.  Youka’s own room received a similar fate.  After rummaging through his materials and placing within the old planning room, he scorched through leaving it completely empty.  In the old days, these simple acts would have been a precursor to any amount of training, and yet now it was the totality of his abilities.  His head hit the pillow that night, and he was asleep before he had even stopped moving, but a hope for a sleepless night due to exhaustion was not one that was to be given.

               His eyes closed in the real world, and yet when they opened it was the same moment he had left.  Blade against his throat, a smiling trickster………he did the only thing he knew……….he caused the world to catch fire.  The resulting explosion of the vacuum bomb caught even himself off guard, and the entire landscape vanished.  His foe seemingly vanquished, until he was not.  “See we are still the same.  Nothing wrong with that…..that’s all anyone will see you as anyway…”  His doppelganger stood, unscathed leaning against a wall.  The scenery was gone only to be replaced with the inside of the Yukigakure leader chambers.  “Just give in…go back to how things where, lead us to a glorious outcome.”  There was a genuine intrigue to the offer.  Something about going back, taking in the joy of life, taking pleasures, taking everything, but he could now see how shallow it all looked.  His eyes met the copies, and though no words came from his lips, the copy created a smile of his own.  “Well, I’ll be here when you fall back into it.  I’m not patient, but I can wait for you.”  He awoke in the hours well before dawn, his own younger face burned into his mind.  The trickster smile, and haunting red eyes.  The rest of the night passed without dreams, but the face remained.

               The next couple of days came and went his forced solitude a relief.  However, as many often find, not having something makes you want it even more.  In his solitude he thought of Den and Aki wanting them closer, when he was near them he feared he needed space.  It was nearly impossible to know what he actually wanted, and the journey had brought him no closer to knowing it.  What it had brought him was a closure with Youka Tau, and that peace was beginning to carry over within him.  He had used his new wood style, mixed with earth and water style to fashion out his tomb.  The dank room now cut smooth, wood flooring, and an earth raised casket along the back wall.  Youka’s own body lay there draped in a black and red cloth.  Along both the side walls earth chakra had been used to create solid containers that now housed everything Youka had had on his person, and any personal effects, as few as there had been, safe beside him.  on top of the cloth he placed the holy book, and the band of rosaries.  Flanking Youka’s tomb two bands of fire stood, ever burning.  The golden fire would burn forever, just as his friend would remain still

               The torture chamber on the other hand, had a completely different look.  Within all mechanisms had finally been cleared out.  Only several narrow escapes, and one shock that had sent him peeing himself in his sleep.  The embarrassing act had caused him to strongly consider kicking Youka’s corpse, but in the end, he let him rest.  He had used earth and water jutsu to clear the room, smoothing out the rock and floor, making it smooth.  Along the eastern wall, a small pond was created and utilizing his newest skills, he had made the rest of the floor into a garden of sorts.  The smells of herbs and spices filled the room, a fresh feeling in other wise what was a cave.  Along the wall, he had carved all the names of the shinobi he had encountered in his times, and for those that had passed he had cut a fine line through their name.
               It was here that he spent much of his time, mediating and reflecting on what their next move was.  There had not been a lot of time with the trio in the village of fangs.  Though Aki had alluded that she had something she needed to speak on, she had yet to reveal her hand before his impromptu trip.  The further away he was from her the stronger his curiosities had become as the hard work of reconstruction had concluded.  Without the task to distract him, he saw her golden hair more often, reflected in the sunlight rays, and in the golden fire surrounding Youka.  He knew he would return, he knew he would hear her out and pursue whatever mission she offered them.  His own life had no purpose in these moments, it was something he was still looking for, and so for now hers would serve as a strong enough one.  He hoped his brother would accept whatever she presented as well, the thought of leaving him behind in the lawless lands outside of village life left a knot in his stomach.

               Adjusting the moss, he stared at the boulder, knowing what lay inside.  Den of Inequity, a fair name for an unfair place.  His pack was lighter than when he had arrived.  What little food and excess supplies he had taken depleted or left behind, to be used at another time.  He wanted to bring Den here so that he could be safe until he regained his full strength.  He wanted to bring AKihana here, so maybe she could be granted some peace and say good-bye.  Whatever Youka meant to her, whatever they had….it was……..something.  There was no jealousy there, no anger or hate.  Love, real love does not know such a thing.  When it came to them, there was no room for hate in his heart even if he disguised it to look like so.  He admired Youka for taking that opportunity.  The man had always had more of a focus, he had always reached out and taken things where Maku had hesitated or resisted for no reason other than to feel the sorrow of missing out.  He had made his heart shallow, and there for he often lacked the room to let the things he wanted inside.

               Dressed back in the same outfit he had worn to arrive, he made his way back through he forest.  Moving quickly towards the ocean where a boat would be waiting.  He felt he was moving faster than he had been before.  His feet more sure, and his strength more finely tuned than it had been before.  He was still far from what he had been, but after his dream, he would come to a place of peace.  He never would be who he was.  Therefore, what if he was never as strong, or as fast, those things did not matter anymore.  He had been what he needed to be to survive those trying times.  Hopefully now, he was what he needed to be to survive the times ahead.  For some reason, this thought had provided him a level of peace.  He had started the journey to regain what he had lost, but now he was chasing something he did not have.  It was always the chase that he enjoyed the most, the challenge, reaching the finish line was never his intention; it was merely being in the race.

               Recovering the pink bike from the bushes, he was pleased to see that it remained intact.  It really would have been a shame to let that little girl down.  No doubt, she was already disappointed that it had been missing the better part of three weeks.  The time had moved quickly and slowly all at the same time.  Moments could last for hours and hours but for moments.  Now that he was back near port, he wondered how long it would be until he desired the alone time he had so willingly given up.  His body was sore, tired from the last couple of days.  He had pushed himself in ways that had not been known in some time.  Even his battle with the assassin had not pushed him as far as his training had.  Now, in a bar waiting for a boat, the exhaustion of it all started to set in.  Putting his head down he closed his eyes but for a moment, the boat to fang still a couple of hours away.  He was vaguely aware of the drink placed in front of him, and the ryo taken in payment before sleep grabbed him.

               His dreams showed a reality where he had not left Takigakure.  A young boy coming back home, and submitting a simple report and going home.  A world where those caring for him had his best interest at heart.  He became a friend and sage to the crustaceans.  Climbing the ranks quickly, first Chunin and then Jounin.  Training others, and developing genjutsu for the village the likes the world had never seen.  Its powers coveted by villages of greater power, and yet not able to take them.  Years went by, training more and more teams, until he was recognized as the new Leader of Takigakure no sato.  Saiga stepping down into retirement, joyfully handing over the hat and office.  The village would come to renown and prosperity, moving from a minor ranking village to one of the powerful major villages within the land.  Trade, and missions abound…….a wife, children.  They were beautiful, and the life was beautiful and perfect.  It was a past that had never happened, yet it was one that just as easily could have.  Crossroads occur, and there is no stepping back once the path is taken.  His own path was taken, and as he awoke and sampled the drink, he smiled, yes, once you have gone down a path there is no turning back, but perhaps if you go far enough, and pick the right paths you can still be led to where you originally missed.

               It was with these thoughts he got on the boat and returned to the land of fangs.  Yes, whatever Akihana had to say, he doubted very much it could be in anyway the path he had already been down.  He knew her, and knew her nature.  She had always chosen peace, and why would now any different.  He even found himself singing while the waves crashed around the vessel.  The red eyes trickster he saw in the dream would have to content himself with the past where he lived.  The day was bright and full of light, and the world offered hope.  His strength in wood release had only begun, but he already was considering the possibility of regrowing the great tree of Takigakure.  It was a small penance, and it may take the rest of his life, but that would be his new mission.  Rebuilding the village that he had forsaken.  He would see it built, raised, and perhaps not a shinobi village but the lease he could do would be to make it a refuge for those like him…..those whose past needed to be walled off so they could find a future.

               Landing in fang, he made the journey back home with the bike over the next couple of hours.  Stopping in several villages to pick up some supplies and produce that he could store within his bag.  The seasons where changing and new items where available.  He was pleased to get them for the restaurant, and wondered how it was getting on in his absence.  They did just fine for a couple of days, but this was the longest he had been gone in some time.  Arriving back in the village, he was pleased to see the restaurant fully staffed, and full of customers.  The clinking of glasses and the playing of music filled the evening air.  A bright light, in a peaceful town.  Walking through the restaurant, he met up with one of his workers who was walking with a perilous stack of plates.  “O sir, you’re back, we could use you’re help, folks are complaining again about the prices of deserts….”  Laughing Maku would start walking by her shaking his head.  “O and by the way, that Blonde girl and your brother are upstairs, I think they been waitin on ya.”  With that, she would return to serving.

               Smiling he made his way through the back kitchen area, dropping off his bag with one of his sous chefs.  Giving her the low down on what was available at the other minor places on the island, and the wares of the port town so that they could begin restocking and see what changes they could make to the menu.  After the briefest of chats, he would start up the stairs towards Denkitki and Akihana.  Yes, things where looking up.  He would rebuild the great tree, he would see a village reborn, and he would leave a life of strife and war behind him.  Perhaps that was what Aki had wanted as well, and she was nervous if he would accept a life so settled down.  Times had changed, and it was time he admitted something else to her.  Something he did not think he ever would have been able to before, when he was so shallow.  It was time to stop trying to change the world, and let the world change him, with peace.

(Closed/exit)

TWC - 5010
+25 stats to speed
Storing 50ap in my mask due to its effects

Claiming Herb and Spice Garden 1,000 words and Wood clone 2500, Fire dragon bullet 1500

Should be good.

Stamped