Reflection upon oneself's life

Snow had finished his job in the mine a few days ago, it was not something he enjoyed doing. This was mostly because he didn't enjoy the cramped spaces of the mine, as opposed to the wide open spaces of the woods that heavily comprised of the land of Fire. There was one great aspect about it though, it paid pretty well. Snow was within the village for the first time in a few weeks after his trip to Volcano country. The trip was still fresh in his mind as he tried to understand just what had happened there.

He was sure that there was more powerful ninja on that island, like that Zaled the leader of the village. Nobody tried to stop him, nobody came for retribution. Was this going to mean war between the two villages? Now Yen wanted to send him back to the same village to deliver a woman that was important to some of them? It was a plan for disaster that could and probably would end up in his and possibly the previous Hokage's death. This was in fact something that Snow had been thinking about ever since his meeting with the Hokage, Yen. 

He felt terrible for what he did, he thought that he had killed all of the emotions that laid dormant within his body, allowing himself to become the tool that the village needed him to be. He thought he had succeeded for a quite some time, the day that he finally forced himself to live through the murder of his mother by the Kiri invader. There was a lot of things that he thought he had burned from within his own psyche, but it was not the truth. He still remembered the woman's face as her body froze over. The look of terror as her body ceased to move.

The memory had burned itself into Snow's mind, causing him to relive the memory again and again. He wanted nothing more than to make it up to her. Why would he have done such a thing? Because she crumpled up a letter? Then he comes back to his "home" so his Kage can simply send him back to the place he had just escaped. March him straight to the front door to what? Send a message? Snow began to feel as though he was a pawn in Yen's chess game, and he didn't care for being played as such.

That was when it hit him, before any of this happened. Before any of this he broke into the Kage's office to ask for a task that would prove Snow's worth. Before he was actually given a task, he was thrown into a conversation with Yen, talking about the chess pieces on that board of his. Is that all he truly was to Yen? A simple pawn on the chess board for him to simply throw around recklessly to see if I would survive the turn? While he wasn't entirely sure that was all he was worth, the evidence was beginning to build toward that direction.

Snow walked through the forests, he was heading back towards the same mine that he had spent a few hours in a couple days ago. But this time he wasn't going in for Tungsten, but this time for something a little more shiny, a little more decorative. This time, he was going for Silver.  He continued to walk through the forest when he would remember the sounds the woman made as the cold began to set in. "Sephora... I'm sorry." Snow would remind himself, recounting the events once again. 

He tried to reassure himself that he wasn't going to die on this mission back to Volcano country, but he knew that all of his words would be empty and pointless. This was a suicide mission and Snow knew it. It was a way to show just how crazy Yen was, otherwise why would you send out the same guy that almost killed one of their own, or did kill depending on if she had actually managed to escaped her situation in that room. He did lock the entire room up with Fuuinjutsu seals to ensure that she wouldn't be able to get out easily. 

"What is next for me in this life?" Snow would ask himself as he began nearing the area in which the mine would be located. "Is it going to be suicide mission after suicide mission until I finally come upon the mission that I don't come back? Is that truly the life that I was meant to live? Is this what my mother gave her life up for? A child that was simply a pawn to be thrown into worse and worse situations until he was finally taken down? No. I refuse that is my reality. I refuse the notion that I am nothing more than a pawn." Snow would assure himself, still not knowing exactly how he was going to get himself out of that situation without dying. But he was going to have to figure something out, no matter what. This was not his time to die, at least he hoped it wasn't. He had finally learned the highest ranked secret technique for his clan, the Jotunn. Now it was going to be his time to shine in combat should the need arise, either that, or perish on the battlefield. 

Snow was getting close enough to the mines that he was able to smell the familiar smell within the mines, the damp and dark mine awaited him, and he was going to do whatever he could to get himself as much silver as he could muster, for he had himself a plan. A He was going to try and create a package for the island in Volcano. Maybe it would be enough to have them forgive Snow for what he did. Maybe they would just kill him on sight and not even bother with the gift that he would prepare, he didn't know. There was far too many things that he didn't know and he was getting exhausted to that fact. 

He walked up to the foreman of the mine that was having a smoke right outside the front entrance of the mine. As he saw Snow getting closer to the mine, the foreman gave out an amused chuckle as the Yuki got closer to the entrance. "I noticed you filled up two extra mine carts before you left. The men really appreciated that from you, as did I. Now what are you looking to obtain today young shinobi?" The foreman spoke with a matter of fact tone.

"I am looking for something a little more decorative this time, not so much for function this time as I did the high grade steel. Looking for silver. Is that something I can procure within this mine?" Snow would ask. The foreman shook his head, "Unfortunately we don't have any veins found within this mine, but if you want to head a little farther into the woods, you will find another mine. I'll let them know that you are on your way. They should let you right in. If I remember correctly they just found a few veins worth of silver within the mine a couple weeks ago, should still be plenty within there to get you what you need." Snow nodded his head and thanked the foreman, who in turn waved him off with some quick direction as to where he should go to find the correct mine. Snow then tightened the straps of his pack and he began to head farther down the path leading through the forests. He hoped that he would find himself some silver fairly quickly for he knew that he was going to need to get back into the village so he could get some training in before he had to get back on the road. 

As he trailed through the pathways, navigating them through the thick of the forests, he would do his best to get his mind off of what had happened to Sephora. He was slightly mad at himself for feeling the way that he did, he knew that he shouldx as a shinobi, be able to destroy his own emotions, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it. He wanted to make it up to them but he was sure that they would simply shrug it off, then kill him for what he did to one of their own. 

Snow would understand it. He did do something unbelievably cruel to her, to that wonderful woman Sephora. She had been nothing but kind to him, and he repaid her with the loss of her legs over the most menial of disrespectful motions towards his Kage. Was he having her pay for something far before? He never read the letter that he was told to deliver, was her crime written on that parchment? A measly piece of paper that sealed the woman's fate, to be punished by the lowly Yuki? He had far more questions than he had answers, but one day he was going to need to have that fixed. 

He arrived at the second mine, where the foreman began waving him into the mine. "I already received the call about you looking for some silver. We have just uncovered an entirely new vein this morning. If you want you can have pick of the litter in that vein, hasn't even been touched yet. Go ahead and head on in, the supervisor of that level of the mine will be able to give you the tools you need and guide you to the correct shaft where the silver can be found." Snow nodded his head and thanked the man as he entered through the front doors of the mine. 

As he entered the mine, the familiar damp smell filled the air that surrounded him within the mines, he was only a few steps within the mine and he was already dreading the environment that he would be enduring soon. He walked deeper into the mine, passing shaft after shaft, wondering if there was ever an end to it. Finally after coming to a mine that was lit by only the artificial light that was dimmed down due to the frigid cold that seemed to be within the mine that they were within. "This is where you will find it, head down toward the end and look to your right, that is where you will find your silver, friend." Snow was more than surprised to hear the words from the supervisor, he was not used to people actually being nice to him within the mines, maybe it was because of the extra work that he had done when he was within the first mine that he was in. 

The supervisor offered Snow a pick axe, to which Snow respectfully declined as he created two shadow clones. Then all three Snows created a pick axe out of ice to begin their work. The three Snows began striking the veins as hard and as fast as they could, getting more and more silver with every strike. They would continue to work until they were able to provide the same gift to the men of this mine as they were able to give the men of the first mine. They would fill up the one mine cart for himself, then he would send it back up to the main hub, then they would fill up one more cart per Snow so he would be able to feel right about taking the work away from the other miners whose whole lives depended on the mine and ore that it inhabited. 

When he finished his work he walked out of the mine and he thanked the supervisor as he walked out of the place. He had been given some processed silver in turn for all of the ore that he had mined for the mine, as well as a small amount of ryo for his troubles. Snow thanked the men and headed back for the village.

Finishing up at the mine, he started to stroll through the woods, heading back to the village. As he headed back to the village, he knew that he was nearing the time that he was going to be leaving for Volcano again. It was only a matter of time before he was going to be on that journey, on that trip back to Volcano. He didn't know how the people were going to react to his showing back up to their island, but he was sure that he wasn't going to be met with the same acceptance as he was the first time. He knew that Sephora would not be happy to see him in any way, if he saw her at all. He wanted to apologize, he knew that he had been foolish to go so far as to maim a woman over the simple disrespect over his kage.

He knew there were people within the shinobi world that would normally kill for their Kage over such simple squabbles. Snow thought he himself was one of them, one of the shinobi that would kill people over nothing. But he wasn't, he thought he had an undying allegiance to his Kage, but he didn't. He was a man of strong convictions, but he didn't know it. He had been hiding himself from himself, every day trying to make him believe that he was more than what he was. He thought he could kill his feelings, but he couldn't. He thought that he could be a tool that would be at his Kage's disposal, but he was beginning to realize that he was more than that. He was more than just some pawn that the Kage could throw the board around without any regard for his safety and health. He understood that the world of the ninja was full of combat and strife, but what he did know was that those Kage that sent their ninja on those missions would have them be sent out in teams, or squads even. Not by themselves with nothing to really help them in the field of battle. 

Yen was his Kage, he knew that. But there was a chunk within his heart that knew that he was not long for this place. When he was out there, walking among the trees away from the village, he knew that that is where he wanted to be. He liked the freedom to go where he wanted to be who he wanted to be. He felt ... free. He came to a clearing that housed a waterfall that fell from a high cliff. The water fell into a gorgeous lake and Snow could help himself but to feel that he needed to go toward the water. The closer he got to the lake, the louder the waterfall would sound impacting against the waters below. As he stood beside the water, he took in a deep breath and he walked up to the center of the water, staring into the waterfall that stood before him. 

His body would go limp and he would slowly begin to fall into the water, thanks to his ice chakra, the water began to freeze around him. The ice kept his body above the water and to keep himself from freezing. Still in a sitting position he began to get dizzy, his vision would blur until it finally went black. His vision would be gone, his hearing and everything else would fade away. 

Suddenly, he woke up and jumped to his feet. "Where am I?" Snow asked himself as he quickly looked side to side trying to figure out where he had been moved to. He looked to be back in Volcano, back on the island, back in the lab's bedroom. He saw Sephora and went into a dead sprint to catch her. "Sephora!" Snow yelled to her as he dropped to his knees beside her. "Sephora I am so sorry for what I did. I didn't realize just how brainwashed I had been until I did what I did to you. Do whatever you ne-" Snow was interrupted by a man ripping the window out, the window that Snow had sealed with the Fuuinjutsu seal. Snow leaped out of the way, throwing two of his kunai directly for the man's vital spots. 

The kunai knives would phase right through the man, but he wouldn't pay any attention to Snow. He picked Sephora up and Snow watched as the blood would pour from her legs. Snow's cries would go unheard as the man would turn and leap through the window, the man would have a puppet of sorts with him, "Who is this?" Snow would think to himself. "Why am I seeing all of this?" Snow would continue his line of questioning to himself. He followed the man out of the room in the lab, but he couldn't he was stuck within the room. That is when it hit him, he was only now realizing the experiences from one of his shadow clones. Snow knew that he had left a second shadow clone, so why am he still in the lab's bedroom? "Shouldn't I see the other clone's perspective? Why didn't this end when the clone was destroyed?" Snow thought to himself. Maybe it was all in his head at that point. He was stuck in the bedroom, with the only thing he could do was stare at the wide pools of blood that would have been Sephora as her legs would have been bleeding out. "I hope they found a way to save her. I pray they found a way to save her." Snow told himself as he placed his hand on the floor where Sephora's body laid, tears welling up in his eyes and falling onto the same spot where her torso was. "I'm sorry Sephora. I wish I could tell you just how sorry I am."

Snow knew that he would have no way of actually telling her, that was only going to lead to more fighting if she even cared to listen to him in the first place. Suddenly his sadness and depression that had overcome him at the sight of Sephora's poor state thanks to his own actions, had turned to anger and frustration. "Damn you!" Snow yelled out. He would direct his anger towards himself, and the man that had sent him out there to perform such actions. He damned the idea of patriotism, the mind set that would bring a soft hearted child to a cold hearted killer or thug. Especially over such simple things like crumpling up a letter from a Kage of an opposing village for the lackluster reasoning of because she didn't like him and he didn't like her. She had every right in the world to not like Yen, he didn't even like Yen! But the moment that he saw her crumple up that letter and throw it to the floor in hysterical laughter, he felt it in his heart and mind that she needed to pay, and she needed to pay hard. 

With this realization, and with his damnation towards himself, his vision began to blur once again. Snow did his best to sit still, focusing on a point on the wall in front of him, but continuing to have his vision drop to stare at the place on the floor. "Sephora...I was wrong. I do hope one day, if I ever see you again, you will allow me to apologize to you in person." His vision would fade into blackness and his body would go limp once again. With a slight flash of warmth on his face, as opposed to frigid cold that was still filling the lab's bedroom, his eyes would shoot open once again. He was walking through the village of Volcano. Snow tried to move his body, but he couldn't. He looked behind him and he saw that same man holding Sephora's bloody body as he was running her into the Hospital to have her cared for. "Thank you God." Snow thought to himself when he saw that she was being cared for. A small piece of his soul was relieved, he didn't feel any less terrible for everything that had happened, but at least he was sure that she was going to have someone help her. 

Snow's vision blurred once again, he could hear her voice for only a second, the voice of Sephora would replay through his mind. The soft sound of her voice only caused him to fall even deeper into his depression, his vision would continue to fall until it would go completely black. For what felt like hours he would remain in the pure pitch black until finally his eyes would open once again. Upon finally seeing light, he would sit up and see the waterfall directly in front of him. "Hey Snow. Now is your time to finally choose." Snow gasped when he saw the man standing before him.

WC:3515
Claims

+70 AP
+2211 towards Seal of Absorption (Completed) (Previous Progress)
+1304 towards Seal of Redirection (1304/2500)

Approved