Coming To Terms [Private]

The rain splashed against the pane of Kaito's bedroom window continuing to fall with no end in sight anytime soon. It had been raining for the past three days, ever since that fateful day at the Sixth Training Grounds of Sunagakure...

Kaito remained bundled in his bed, rolled into a ball. The tears had stopped the day before, but he didn't realize it. He still choked and whined as though he was crying, but had nothing else left to shed. He just sat there as his mind stayed focused on one thing and one thing only...

He had killed a man...

Not just any man, however...

The missing-nin who had killed his best friend when he was ten years old; Bunta Jinpacho. Kaito didn't remember much from the ordeal, but quick and untimely flashes reminded him that the whole thing had been in fact real, but Kaito could feel something... different about himself...

'What the hell got into me?' He thought,, the will to ask himself aloud being completely nonexistent. 'What the hell am I?' Suddenly, a knock sounded upon the door that led into the bedroom. Kaito remained silent and still, hoping that whatever or whoever it was would go away soon enough. They didn't however, waiting a minute before finally opening the door inwards. Kaito didn't move his head, but he could see from the corner of his eye that it was his ex-shinobi father; Haji Inuzuka.

"Son..." Haji said, opening the door just enough for him to peer his upper body in. There was concern on his voice. Kaito hadn't told Haji or even his mother, Akari, of what happened at the training grounds, but he was sure that the concern stemmed from the fact that he had kept himself locked in his room for the better part of three days without even so much as eating. "Kai, what's going on?"

Kaito continued to ignore his father as though he was nonexistent. Haji's face twitched, the edges of his lips curling.

"You know you can talk to me, Son." He said with a sigh. "If it is something that happened on a mission or something that you saw, I would know better than anyone how to help you come to terms with it all..." Kaito knew that this was correct with no doubt in his mind. The man had lost his arm on a mission before he was even born and fought against invading Kirigakure forces during the boy's childhood in Konoha, for crying out loud.

A clock on the wall ticked, that being the only sound that would reply. With a sigh, Haji nodded and began to retreat from the room until only his head was visible.

"Just know that you're Mother and I are always here for you, Son... We love you..." With that Haji completely disappeared into the hallway after closing the door softly behind him. Kaito was now all alone again with his thoughts... He wished he could stay this way for the rest of his days...

'But can I continue to love myself?'

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Hours went by, the rain not letting up for anything or anyone. Kaito remained in his bed, still curled up in a ball. He hated this feeling; the feeling of utter terror he felt from this other him deep within the recesses of his mind; the hatred he held for his weakness. He despised all of it. And deep down he knew that if he did nothing about it all soon, this terror and hatred would consume him again. He would be in the same boat that he had been during his time at the Academy.

Using every ounce of strength that he held within himself, which wasn't a lot considering the fact that he hadn't been able to sleep for the past three days, and rose upwards. He winced as he rose thanks to the pain he felt in his gut from not having eaten, but he would manage.

'Food can wait...' He thought, shifting his legs over the edge of the bed. 'I know what I need right now...'

Removing himself from the bed entirely, Kaito coaxed around the room for a moment, throwing on a dark green tank top, underwear, khaki cargo shorts, and his black sandals. Looking in the standing mirror in the corner of his room, upon which he rested his headband and happuri, and instead of slicking back his hair like he normally would when off duty, opted to keep it in the distinctive ponytail it had been for the past few days. As he continued to look upon his reflection, his eyes narrowed and a sour frown overtook his look of indifference.

"You're a disgrace, Kaito..." He tsked. Letting the words that he addressed to himself soak up within his consciousness, he walked away from the mirror, grabbed his item pouch from his nightstand, and halted just beyond the window. He opened it quietly as to not alert his parents and clamored out of it to stand upon the first-story roof of his family home. From there he jumped down into the muddy streets below, landing a bit awkwardly as it still continued to pour rain down from the heavens. He turned towards the direction of the Training Grounds and just stared walking. The look of indifference was now back upon his face, but deep down Kaito could feel a small mixture of determination and fear well up in his belly.

'The only thing I need right now...' He started thinking as he placed his hands meekly into the pockets of his khaki shorts. 'is to come to terms with it all...'

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Kaito made the journey from his home to the Training Grounds, which typically takes about twenty minutes while  walking at a normal speed, at a slug's pace. While he absolutely knew that he had to do this, it did not mean that he absolutely wanted to. What he wanted right now more than ever was to run away from it all, to shield himself from the horrors of this world; the world of Shinobi.

'Can I even do this anymore?' He thought, reflecting back on the day that he and Naki had cleaned up the Grove and went on to demolish an apartment complex and help build another one from the ground up in its place. On that very day not so long ago he had asked himself quite a similar question. Back then he came to the conclusion that he would overcome any obstacle that blocked his way, no matter how big or small, and fulfill his dream to become the Kazekage.

His dream now, however, seemed like a pipe dream...

'How could I ever become the Kazekage if I can't even cope with this?' He asked himself, the gates that separated the Training Grounds from the rest of the village coming into view. 'Hell if I'm this disappointed in myself, I bet Tima is even more so...' The young Inuzuka's memories jumped to those of his first meeting with Arantima, who taught the boy that strength needed to be gained from hand work and determination. Up until the other day, Kaito had been one of the most driven people he knew, but now...

"Can I see your identification papers, please?"

Kaito shook his head, realizing that a voice was meeting his ears. He looked up and noticed that he was now standing just outside the gates at the guard station. There, of course, stood a guard with his arm out and an open palm.

"Sor-sorry..." Kaito said as he shuffled his left arm into the item pouch attatched to the back of his left hip. He removed from the pouch his papers and handed them meekly to the guard.

"You doing some training, Kid?" The guard asked as he looked over the paperwork.

"Something like that..." Kaito replied unenthusiastically. He supposed his purpose for being there could be considered a sort of "mental training". After a moment the guard handed Kaito back his identification papers and the boy replaced them back into his pouch.

"All is in order." The guard pressed a button within the confines of his post box and the gates started to creak open. "Good luck."

"Thanks..." Kaito said, his voice trailing off as he choked, his heart beginning to pound faster and faster in his chest. He was now entering the belly of the beast; the place he had killed Bunta Jinpacho...

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The trek though the Training Grounds that led to the gate of the Sixth Training Ground was quite the hike when taking into consideration the vast amount of rain that had been falling nonstop. None of it bothered the young Inuzuka, however, as he had much more pressing matters to attend to. Even now, though, three days later, the rain still continued to fall. It was all very much unprecedented for not only Sunagakure, or even the Wind Country as a whole for a matter of fact.

Brushing it off, Kaito continued walking to his destination. This destination, of course, would the site of the murder...

The place where he had killed Bunta Jinpancho.

'Tima said that I had killed that guy in order to protect him, but still...' More and more flashes of the events came and went as Kaito continued on. 'Something was definitely off about the whole thing...'

Within a moments time, Kaito was now faced with the gate. Beyond that laid the sandy plains and dunes that was made up the confines of the Sixth Training Ground. The young Inuzuka couldn't help but gulp as he now came face-to-face with the place that had turned him into whatever it was he had become.

He was now face-to-face with this darkness that laid dormant deep within his soul...

"You can do this, Kai..." He said to nobody in particular, just trying to hype himself up and give himself the confidence that he would need to continue onwards. There he stood for another few minutes contemplating; sorting out the millions upon millions of thoughts that crossed his mind at the speed of light. This would be interrupted, however, as a cold hand laid itself upon the boy's shoulder. Jumping, Kaito placed his left hand into his item pouch. He glasped a tightly balled fist around one of the kunai that resided within before turning around and cocking his head until it rested slightly askew upon his neck. The hand belong to a tall gentleman in dark brown capri-styled pants, a short-sleeved fishnet shirt, and a brown trench coat with cut off sleeves.

"Woah now..." The man said, holding up his arms as to show that he meant Kaito no harm. "I'm just here to talk as all." Wiping the sweat and rain from his brow with his right arm, Kaito removed his hand from the kunai inside his pouch and held it loosely against the side of his body.

"Dad?" He asked, confused. Sure enough, the man was one that he recognized as Haji Inuzuka; his father. How did the man realize that Kaito had snuck out of the house, let alone where on earth he would be. "What the heck are you doing here?"

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Haji stepped ever closer to Kaito, his hands lowering down to his side. A feint smile was plain to see upon his face.

"I'm a Sensory-type ninja, Kid." He said with a chuckle. "You didn't think I would sense your Chakra leaving my vicinity?" Kaito cursed under his breath and kicked some sand up with his sandal weakly. Once Haji was directly in front of his son, he knelt down upon his right knee and lowered himself until his eyes were level with Kaito's. The smile upon his face quickly turned to a look of seriousness and concern. "Son, what really is going on?" Kaito frowned sourly at his father and shook his head from side to side.

"You wouldn't understand, Dad..." He said simply. Haji lightly released some air from his nostrils.

"I wouldn't understand?" He asked as he placed in what could only be descried as a delicate, yet forceful, hand upon Kaito's shoulder. "You remember that I used to be a Shinobi myself, right? I've seen my fair share of messed up things." Kaito continued to do his best to ignore his father, not bothering to look the man in the eyes any longer. Haji pressed on still, knowing that he could easily break through the thin delicate shield his son was fronting. "Please, Son... Just tell me an-"

"I killed him, alright!?" Kaito snapped, throwing his father's hand off his shoulder before stepping back a few feet. His breathing became much heavier, the words that had escaped his mouth seeming totally unreal. Haji looked at him confused, so Kaito let out an annoyed sigh. "I killed that bastard with my own two hands, Dad..." Looking down upon his hands, Kaito could still see in his mind's eye the blood that had stained them that day. Of course they had been washed thuroughly since then, but to Kaito the picture was still clear as day. "I killed Bunta Jinpacho; the son of a bitch that killed Kawomaru!"

"Bunta..." Haji shook his head, still confused. "Kaito, Bunta has been dead for three years. I was the one who killed him!" Kaito laughed almost hysterically Haji's claim.

"You killed him!?" Kaito retorted. "Bullshit, Dad! I would remember that face anytime!" Tears started to drip down his face, sniffles filling in between his words. "That... god aw-awful face..." Haji winced, knowing that his gentle son would never lie about such a thing. If Kaito said that he had come across Bunta Jinpacho, then by God he had come across Bunta Jinpacho. He just wished that the ghost from their past would have stayed where it belonged; in the past.

"Kai..." Haji said solemnly. "I'm sorry..." Haji almost took a step forward to wrap his son in his arms, but decided to simply rise to his feet and stay planted where he was. He would allow Kaito to finish his bout of anger and despair, knowing that should Kaito keep his feelings bottled up as he had that the kid would become something other than himself.

Something darker...

Soon enough, though, Kaito finished his crying. Closing his eyes and taking in a deep breath, he realized just how much better he really felt after having spoken his true emotions. Slowly he opened his eyes again as he let out his breath. He locked eyes with Haji, a much more serious look upon his face now as he prepared himself to speak.

"Dad, I came here to think things through. I meant no harm by not telling you anything, its just that I couldn't believe what all had happened myself." Kaito looked down upon his opened palms again. "I still don't know all of the details myself, really." Haji shook his head with as to say that he completely understood. "I need to collect my thoughts and fill in the gaps as best I can, so can you please let me alone while I do this?" A brief pause filled the air. "I'll make sure that I'm back home in time for dinner."

"Take your time, Son." Haji replied as he turned his back towards Kaito and prepared to walk down back the path towards their home. "A Shinobi's first kill is always the hardest to wrap their head around. It was the same for me all those years ago." He rubbed the back of his neck, his own thoughts taking him back down memory lane. "Just please don't do anything drastic." With that Haji started walking back down the path. Kaito looked on with a feint smile until his father was out of sight beyond the trees, bushes and rain.

"Thanks, Dad." He said in a mere whisper before he himself turned back towrds the gates that led into the Sixth Training Grounds. He took in a deep breath before releasing it much more slowly than the one he had taken in moments before. Clasping his hands meekly upon the handle of the gate, Kaito could feel his hands tremble slightly. "Here we go..." He said as the gate creaked open inwards towards the biggest confrontation the young Shinobi had faced up until this point...

The confrontation of self-reflection...

The battle within himself...

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The gate that led further into the sandy grounds of the Sixth Training Ground creaked open ominously. Sure it was been midday by this time, but the dark clouds that loomed over the village only seemed to add to the suspense that Kaito felt within his chest. The rain too seemed to pick up speed as it fell from the heavens above, making sure that the journey from Kaito's current position just beyond the grasp of the sand would be a messy and muddy one.

'I can do this...' The young Inuzuka coaxed, pounding his fists together as though to build up the nerve.

With a deep sigh Kaito took the first step into the training ground. His heart began to beat faster and faster as he pressed on, but he knew deep down that he could do this.

He could face his inner demons...

Before he knew it Kaito came to the spot where he and Arantima had been training. The fifty meter by fifty meter arena they had made was still very much visible, having been dug out by large Fūma Shuriken. The deep trenches were now overfilled moats, the rain having filled them to the brim long before Kaito's reappearance at the scene. Kaito narrowed his eyes as he looked within the confines of the makeshift battleground that had eventually become an actual battleground.

"I can do this..." This time Kaito let the words come physically from his mouth instead of keeping them within his head. He felt as though hearing it aloud would give him the guts to press on, and sure enough it would. Without thought Kaito placed his right foot atop the watery moat that divided him from the arena, making use of the "Water Walking" technique that had been taught to him in the Academy. He continued walking forward until he found a pool of blood and guts that had colored the sand like paint. The urge to throw up and run back home took much more notice in Kaito's mind, but was subsided when suddenly Kaito heard a loud, maniacal laughter. His body clenched and his senses were now on high alert, but he didn't see a thing as he scoured the rainy dunes that surrounded him. Still, the laughter only seemed to grow louder and louder.

"Who's there!?" He shouted, demanding an answer from whoever it was that was messing with him. Then he felt his heart flutter within him.

'Who do you think, Kaito?'

The words themselves carried no physical form, only sounding off within the young Shinobi's head. While he had never heard the voice himself aloud, Kaito knew without a doubt whom the voice belonged to.

'So, you've finally showed up.' The voice roared out with laughter, barely giving Kaito a chance to say his own choice of words internally.

'That's right...' The voice replied before pausing for a moment. 'The real you!'

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The voice sounding off internally in Kaito's head sure was a loud and obnoxious one. And what in the world did it mean when it said it was "the real you" while addressing the young Inuzuka? Those were just a couple of the questions running around Kaito's mind as he squatted down upon his knees and crossed his arms loosely around his legs.

'The real me, huh?' He asked internally, knowing without question that the other voice could hear it and would surely reply.

'Oh, come one, Kaito!' It replied, a serious hint of animosity and condescendence filling its tone. 'The you that was born that day three years ago.' A brief pause filled the air as Kaito let the comment burn into his soul.

'The day Bunta and his goons killed Kawomaru...'

'Bingo, Smart Guy!' The voice began laughing obnoxiously and ominously again. 'Damn and here I thought I was the smart one of the group.' Another moment of silence befell Kaito, the sound of the rain falling around him falling upon deaf ears. 'You know the two of us can really make a hell of a team, Kai. We can real-'

'There is no we.' Kaito interrupted calmly. 'I work alone.'

'What about the road to becoming the Kazekage? You know the Kazekage and all of the Kage have to do some very dirty work in order to keep their villages safe from harm.'

Kaito shook his head from side to side. He knew that the statement was only based in fact. Looking upon the history of Shinobi, more importantly the series of wars and close calls that had befallen the Shinobi World over the past few decades, the Kage of the last few generations really had kept their hands dirty. He was sure that even the most recent Kazekage had to keep her hands dirty every once in a while.

'I'm gonna change that.' He replied simply.

'Oh grow the hell up, Kaito!' The voice snapped. It had enough force behind it that it made the young Inuzuka's heart flutter and vision pulse. 'There were many people just like you before! Ones who wanted to become a Kage and 'change the way the world works'. You ever hear of them!? No!'

'Well why the hell is that then!?'

'Because there has never been a Kage like that in history!' Kaito could feel the voice become ever more powerful. With this sudden burst of power Kaito could feel his own sense of self getting overrun. His body shot upwards and he slammed a closed right fist into his open left palm. These actions were not his own and he tried his best to fight them, but this Dark Kaito that resided within him was just too strong. With the slamming of his hands together was the trigger of the "Emotions On Your Sleeve" technique, and their enactment suddenly made Kaito's hair, eyes, and Chakra aura erupt in a deep black color. This Dark Kaito also took the opportunity while it was in complete control to activate the boy's skill in the use of "Display Of Power", making his Chakra shake the very earth below his feet and take the same disgusting shape of the black wolf with red, glaring eyes behind him. Just as it had when it made its first appearance only a few days before, it snapped its muzzle open and shut as though it was ready to devour anything and everything in its path.

'Look at the power I've helped you to amass, Kai!' The voice said as it forced the boy's head backwards upon his shoulders to take in the sight behind him. 'You need me, and I am going to help you achieve your goal of becoming the Kazekage and then some!'

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