Imminent Idiot

Nanaki was tired. He'd walked and walked and floated and fallen and tripped and slid for miles and days, now. Yes, he was so tired that he almost stumbled directly into something really foul-smelling. What the hell was this!!?! He'd been through a lot in the past few days, but nothing like this. The smell of rotten flesh wafted through the tepid air to him, making him retch with disgust.
...
Just how far had he traveled from his home? He scratched his head as he backed away from the edge of this... wetland? Field? Swamp? He was unsure. There was something seriously unsettling about it, too. Maybe it was the pikes with the vaguely corpse-like objects impaled on them. Or maybe it was just Nanaki's wild imagination? He'd been told that he had one of those by his teachers before.

He blinked once, then twice. Then he pinched himself. Ow! No, definitely not his imagination. Crap, what was he supposed to do now? Either he walked through this grimy, gloomy place and risk something scary happening, or sit there and do nothing.
...
Or turn back.
No, he couldn't do that. The not-voices in his head told him to press on, but not where to go. If only the not-whispers became more coherent...

While the boy pondered what to do, a shadow stirred in the recesses of the mire. A random NPC ninja of the village, who within the game itself believed he had full control over his life, when in fact he was just a puppet to push stories.

Oops.

Either way, the man would bring his report on this random suspicious looking stranger to the Kumo mission office. With any luck... someone would get rid of that guy. It wasn't his responsibility, after all.

Meanwhile, Nanaki (wearing a rather filthy and unrecognizable uniform, having lost his headband from sheer stupidity a while ago) had sat down a few feet away from the start of the rotting area. What to do... it was like he was thinking through a fog, like always.

Senshi blinked tiredly as he finished writing out yet another boring report. Things had changed greatly in the past few weeks, and rather than finding himself on the front lines he had been ordered to stay back and man the village defences. With the majority of the villages strength off conquering unknown lands, someone had to be responsible for the defence of the village. The Raikage's not clone, still handled the majority of the day to day affairs but Senshi had found himself in charge of scores of ninja. Primarily Genin, or weak Chuunin, or even those that had been sent back from being injured during the conquests. He found himself juggling guard schedules and every other boring administrative task he had never imagined he would be forced to over see. Maybe getting promoted to Jounin was a curse that they only gave on the particularly wicked shinobi?

Either way, Senshi was bored. His eyes shifted up as he heard the approaching footsteps of an unknown person. He had been given a tiny little office, little more than a cleaning closet really, that had been made even smaller by packing in a desk, two chairs, and a bookshelf. A light knock on the door and Senshi's deep, guttural voice echoed out telling the person to enter. A slght click and then a creak of the not well oiled hinges and Senshi was looking at a nervous Genin. "Sir, theres an unknown person sitting at the edge of the defences. We weren't sure what to do so Chuunin Toji told us to report it to you." Senshi nodded before waving the boy off and telling him to go back to his post. With a slight creek of the chair and the old desk he pushed himself up grabbing the hilt of Gureto, his bastard sword, before he began manuevering around the desk. 

Once he stepped outside of the tiny little office, he checked to make sure his ninjato was strapped in blace across his lower back, both of his tanto's were on his hips, and that his clothing was as straight as possible. Technically speaking, he did not need to go to the gates to check this out, but it was a good excuse to stretch his legs. Plus, Toji was an injured Chuunin who had just been cleared for duty again. His entire guard shift was comprised of new Genin fresh out of the academy, it would be best if he headed out there himself just to make sure there was no threat. Or at least, that was his excuse. Anything to get out of that cramped little office. Underneath his loose fitting shirt, and over his red wraps, he was wearing his Jounin vest marking him as the current leader of the defences.

His feet carried him at a slightly hastened pace to the gates and as he looked out from one of the view vantage points he spotted the boy. Raising a slight eyebrow the bearded Jounin jumped from the ramparts landing lightly in the rot forest and walked sedately towards the boy. He had one hand resting lightly on one of his tanto's, prepared to draw it at a moments notice. His other hand hovered near his weapons pouch prepared to throw an arsenal of death at the boy should he make a threatening move. After several minutes of slow walking he was finally within twenty meters of the newcomer and the bearded Jounin rose his voice to call out. "Who are you and why are you at the gates of Kumogakure? I suggest you make no sudden moves and keep your hands in view at all times." As he spoke he had continued walking forwards.

Nanaki would be greeted to the sight of the six foot seven, overly muscles Jounin. If he was particularly observant he would see the scar going from just above Senshi's right eye across his nose and ending at his left cheek bone. He would possibly be able to even make out the burn marks that covered the entirety of the left side of his face climbing down and dissapearing into the red wraps that covered everything but his hands and feet. Senshi tensed his muscles causing them to stick out more than before as he prepared for the boy to make some sort of attack or threatening move. He didn't look like much, but Senshi was not in the habit of underestimating someone. That was, after all, how someone ended up dead.

Nanaki's olfactory nerves had just gotten used to the awful stench coming from the forest, when he got another shock from some bearded guy, almost frightening the daylights out of him. Whew, so the world was a dangerous place after all. He sat there for just a few seconds and gawked at the man before him. Uh.... how to respond? His brain crawled along, trying to search for an answer. Right, the people at the academy had spent quite some time teaching him how to handle someone like this. He stood up quickly, and faced the man, a blank (yet somehow panicked) expression on his face.

"Hello, sir! My name is Nanaki Ayakura, and I'm a genin! My teachers always told me never to talk to strangers, but here I am anyways. How are you? What is your name?" Uhh... he'd gotten that in the wrong order, hadn't he? His face suddenly gained a perplexed, worried expression as he thought about what he'd just said. Crap, he was going to look bad in front of a random stranger. Shit, wait... did he just say Kumogakure? Had he misheard? There was no way he could have walked that far on his own... to be fair, he wasn't sure for how long he'd been travelling. It was hard for him to remember how many days had passed by.

Still, he had actually somehow stumbled across another hidden village! Ooh, how exciting. This place didn't seem like a very healthy spot to put a village, though. He wondered how the people on the inside were doing. Were they somehow protected from this obviously "wrong" forest? He sure hoped so, he didn't like the idea of infected folk walking around in a zombie-like daze. Still, with this greeting, he would await the other person's answer.

[Sorry for shortposting ya x.x]

Senshi stared at Nanaki awkwardly, his hands had moved of their own accord when the boy had stood up quickly. They had drawn the tantos that were placed on his hips and were held out in front of him in a defensive stance. One of his legs had slide backwards across the rocky ground, the annoying grating sound echoing throughout the creepily silent forest. Now he was prepared for an attack, hoping that the boy wasn’t actually going to be dumb enough to do something like that but not willing to bet his life on it. He was surprised when the boy before him began speaking all of a sudden.
 
Was he suffering some sort of mental defect in order to not have listened to anything that Senshi had said at all? Probably, or maybe he was just nervous. Judging by the fast pace of his words, and the fact that he had identified himself as a Genin, Senshi could guess that his reaction had been a nervous one. He seemed slightly socially awkward, but really, Senshi wasn’t much better in that regard anyways.  Senshi blinked as the boy mixed his words up but didn’t comment on it, instead he continued to stare at Nanaki with a critical eye.
 
He had said he was a Genin which meant that he wasn’t a missing nin, but Senshi still didn’t know what his purpose for being here was or what village he hailed from. With the war going on this could always be just a distraction however, and as Senshi replaced his tantos into his hilts when his hands flashed down at a speed of 100 he made a sign towards the Gate guards who were undoubtedly watching to keep an eye on the area around him. Senshi extended his chakra sensory, but he couldn’t feel anything else even when he was focusing on it as hard as he could. He would kill this boy quickly, but painfully if he was a distraction and attempting to attack his village.
 

Their safety was his primary concern and he wouldn’t let anyone force him to fail in that duty, even if they were just a kid. “Kobayashi Senshi, Jounin. What village do you hail from and what is your purpose here Genin Nanaki?” Senshi’s eyes narrowed on the boy and using the Display of Power skill he unleashed the full force of not only his chakra but also made it seem like he had far more than he really did. He was intent on making the boy feel like an oppressive aura was around him in order to hopefully scare him into telling the truth. Much how Maku had once done to his team when they had first encountered him. He would go back to suppressing his chakra after Nanaki had spoken, in order to prevent any possible infiltrators from memorizing his chakra. He kept his eyes glued to Nanaki, trusting the gate guards to keep a keen eye out and to watch his back in case this was just a diversion.

Hot damn! This guy was a jonin. Whoa.... so cool... Nanaki knew he'd probably be stuck as a genin for life, but the dream of being a jonin was something straight out of heaven for him. Still, a very small part of his dysfunctional brain noted that while the dream was nice, the fact of the matter was... that he'd probably die soon. He was a literal idiot without anyone to guide him, out here in the wide world without anyone to help or guide him. He was also WAY too trusting, even though he didn't know it, and wouldn't admit it if he did.

"Um... I'm from Sunagakure, you know. Lots of sand, hehe... not like this place, it's kind of smelly." Well, not anymore... he'd become fully accustomed to it now. Weird how that worked, right? Acclimatization, they called it, though Nanaki knew nothing of that. He'd studied in his books, but didn't have the brain capacity to remember long words like that. A pity, wasn't it? A boy, born with good genes, but a brain just above that of your average moron. A waste, they had called him. Someone to be abandoned. Still, he didn't mind. He'd dealt with rejection all his life, no reason to start crying about it now. Whether a person smiled or wept, in the end, they all ended up six feet under. May as well smile.

Of course, it was at that moment that he felt an enormous pressure. He didn't have the refined ability to sense chakra, but he could certainly feel something pressing on him. He looked around in slight panic, unsure what it was or where it was coming from.

"W-what the hell is that?? You feel that too, man? What's goin' on?" And just like that, it was gone.

What. The. Hell?

"Huh... coulda sworn there was something there a while ago..."

Senshi blinked, once. Very slowly. It was the only sign of... lets call it restlessness to be nice. In fact it was a sign of terrible impatience and a complete lack of understanding. Was this kid an idiot or did he have a death wish of some sort. Senshi, made a sign behind his back alerting the guards to keep an even closer eye out on what was going on. He knew that General Slaanesh, the great and wondrous MakuKage, had left to conquer Sunagakure. Yet here was a kid admitting that he was from there and disparaging the place he had come to. Kumo did no smell, it had a wondorful fragrance once you grew used to it. Like rotting decay and the worst flatulance imaginable mixed together. But once you got used to that smell out here, everything else just smelt so wonderful. Plus the actual village didn't smell like this, they were just smack dab in the middle of the Rot forest and as such the smell was meant to disconcert potential enemies from wanting to come closer to the village. 

At least that is what Senshi considered it was there for, in reality it was just an occupational hazard of having zombies running around. As the boy reacted to his display of power, Senshi had to use every ounce of control he had ever had in order to not face palm in exasperation. This kid was going to be every bit as taxing on his slowly fraying nerves as Komori and Sora had been. What in the world had he done to deserve this type of treatment. Why couldn't more people be like Max, Reizo, Komon, or Itami? With a light sigh Senshi straighten his posture from the minute sagging of his shoulders from the utter disbelief that this kid was causing him to feel. He was so the wrong person to be dealing with people, when would anyone ever learn that? 

"You do realize that this is Kumogakure correct? The Land of lightning. The nation that just attacked yours so that we could subjugate you to our ideals." Senshi paused waiting to see what the boy would do to those words. It was odd that if their had been an attack force that they would wait so long to do anything. Senshi felt no threat from the boy, but he couldn't allow overconfidence to get ahold of him. It was just hard sometimes, like right now, to not give into it and treat this boy, possibly a Genin or Chuunin, like a five year old. "Look, Nanaki, what rank are you in Sunagakure's forces? Why are you here, at our gate?"

"Whaaaaaat.... I told you, I'm just a genin." Some people just couldn't listen, right? Maybe he'd misheard... still, Nanaki found it odd that the conversation was taking this kind of turn. Naturally, he was completely oblivious to the fact that this man was quickly growing exasperated. He had no sense of tone (yet), despite his time around other people. There was obviously something preventing him from thinking straight, like other people did, but because of his defect, he had yet to figure out exactly what. Ironic, wasn't it? Unless he got fortunate enough and discovered the power that lay dormant within his cells, he would never be able to escape the cycle of idiocy.

"Um... wait, Kumo attacked us?" But then why was this guy here? For once, Nanaki's brain kicked him. Right, they needed someone to watch the village. "I mean, I don't know anything about that. I was just told to evacuate; I'm just a genin after all. I'm still not even sure how I ended up here in the first place, to be perfectly honest with you..." He scratched his head in bemusement. There was no way in hell he had walked all the way to Kumo. Had he flown some distance? He vaguely remembered making rather large leaps... but no, that was impossible. The only way that could happen was if he actually had some kind of hidden talent...

Of course, by this point, Nanaki had also forgotten about the little session he'd had in his room back in Suna. Not a masturbation session, of course. Still, he didn't realize that the more he stressed himself like this, the more he awakened. Right now, he felt particularly pressured. 

"Yeah, I'm not exactly sure why I'm here, myself. It's not like I know what direction I was walking in anyway... ehehe..."

((I super apologize for this post I don't feel well but I don't want to hold you up ether))

Senshi stared at the kid as he repeated his rank in what sounded like a rather exacerbated tone to him. Whether he meant it that way or not that was how Senshi's ears perceived it, though it didn't bother him. If the kid had said he was a Genin already Senshi must have memory wiped it from himself magically. Somehow. Must have been that new Starbucks unicorn frap that was cursing him to half life of existence. Or he was getting old. You know both theories made a lot of sense. Still as the kid continued talking, Senshi was coming to the conclusion that he was not here as some sort of prelude to an attack. He really did seem to be more like a confused, bumbling idiot than anything else.

Senshi didn't want to underestimate him, but hat was getting harder and harder to stick by the longer he was speaking to him. With an almost world weary sigh, Senshi spoke again. His voice was as monotonous as before but this time when he spoke he did so slightly slower than last time. After all, how could you not know what direction you were traveling in? "Yes, Kumo has attacked your village. Yes you are at our gates. This is quickly becoming a tiresome escapade, as such I'm going to give you one option." Senshi's eyes hardened on the young Suna shinobi before him as he directed every ounce of killing intent he possessed on to the boy.

"You will submit to a search. You will be bound, and transported to our leader's office where he will decide what we shall do with you. You will not be treated unfairly rather we shall be as respectful as possible, nor shall you be harmed unless the Raikage deems it so. We will confiscate your weapons, until such time you are deemed a non-threat. You can comply peacefully or I can force you to. That is your o my choices. Which shall it be Nanaki of Sunagakure?"

As the boy refused to answer Senshi grew irritated, they really didn't have room for more prisoners in their already over populated criminal population. Plus the kid was an enemy shinobi, there was really no point in letting him in the village. The hazard was too great, he could just be hiding his abilities in order to cause Kumo more damage later. As such, Senshi made a decision he had not been forced to make in a long time. For the betterment of Kumo, Senshi would have to kill the kid. He was being uncooperative and they just couldn't have that. Stepping forwards quickly, Senshi's hand pulled his tanto from its sheath as he moved, he would make it quick. Slice the boys throat and be done with it.

Once that was complete Senshi collected the body, and head of his downed opponent taking whatver Ryo and items he had on him before taking him back to Kumo. His head would go on a pike, and his body to the hospital to be examined for any potentential bloodlines or for the Raikage to experiment on as he wished. He would write up a scroll detailing the incident and send it off to the Raikage to let him know what had happened. 


----EXIT-----

Claiming:
Kill on Nanaki As he NPC'd Himself
Any ITems/Money on Nanaki Nanaki Stat Page - As he has nothing listed and never did any missions or bought anything that should be just 500 Ryo
Nanaki's Body
Putting Nanaki's head on a pike with his headband attached for all to see
Sending Raikage a message letting him know that a Suna nin was killed at the gate, and his head is on a pike and his body is available for experimentation