To get stronger

"To die a brave ninja's death or to live as a coward" this question have certainly ran through a shinobi's mind at least once in their life. Whether it being before their Shinobi entrance exam or before their death when life flashes in front of their eyes. What's the better choice? Is it to die while protecting the village or to beg for mercy and live? In the past, there have been many ninjas who died trying to save their village. There have been many kages who go into battle knowing that they'd lose. But they sacrificed themselves. However there are also those who chose to retreat. Those who begged for their lives. Which is the right choice? Which will benefit the whole world more? This question stay unanswered.

Panting, the man crawled backward, his eyes fixed on the men in front of him. Fear was all he could feel, he didn't eevn notice the sweat on his body. The boy felt his back touching the wall behind him and glanced back to see the despair. He opens his mouth to cry for help but no word could escape his lips, he tried to get up and retreat but his body was paralyzed. Knowing that escape was futile, he watches the larger man in front of him. The man's offered in cloak, his eyes shadowed. But his creepy smile was scary enough to froze the kid. The kid panicky reach down to his weapon pouch but he was too nervous to grab a hold onto something. The man would just smile upon this as he draw closer, his kunai flashing before the sunlight. His smile got wider and he leaned down toward the boy. He stared right into boy's eyes and aim his kunai right on the boy's neck. They both stopped as red liquid started coming out of the boy's neck.

"Ahh!" exclaimed Kara as pant heavily on his bed. He wipes the sweat off his face and look outside the window trying to get rid of the bad dream he just have. "Horrible dream," muttered Hero to himself. He glances over to the clock and it seems like he woke up 10 minutes before the alarm clock he set so he set it off then started preparing for the day ahead of him. It's gonna be a training day.

But then again, that dream he had earlier got him thinking. He can't remember the face of the two people involved in it. No more importantly, who will he be? The person who kill or the person who get killed? Or the hero that failed to rescue the boy? Hero pours a glass of milk. He glances at his ninja headband lying on his drawer then sip his milk. He asked himself that if he were to get cornered by the enemy, would he fight bravely to his death? Or will he beg for mercy trying to escape unharmed even if it mean betraying his own village? Will he die bravely or live cowardly? Thus, he ponders. "I need to get stronger," Hero mumbled to himself gulping down the last bit of milk.

***

Kara started doing his daily morning routine, brush his teeth, shower, get dressed then walk downstair for breakfast - more precisely some apples. His choice of clothing for that day is his black hoodie with white t-shirt underneath it and black pants with men's skirt on top of it. Though today he decided to add something before getting breakfast which is to visit his dad's room. His dad have a tons of book regarding jutsus and so forth. He decided that it's time to a new one, perhaps a strong one as well.

Kara walks toward his dad's room then look for the "B-Rank Jutsu" category. "I need a strong jutsu, preferably a defensive one because I'm bad at it," murmured Kara. He skims through for a minute and found a book called "Earth Release: Earth Spear" the name attracted his attention. He pulled out the book then skim through it. Apparently he need to have high stamina to use this jutsu effectively which isn't possible for him. "I'll come ack for you later, buddy" he said to himself. He puts the book back then search for another jutsu then found "Insect Jar". He pulled the book out, read the description then decided that it was it.

The 16 years old genin walked out, grab 4 apples then notify his dad that he borrowed one his jutsu book. "Which jutsu?" his dad asked. "Nah just a small one, I just feel like learning something," lied Kara. His dad nods then begin to eat his breakfast again. "So bye, I'm gonna be out for awhile" said Hero before walking out.

***

After a long thoughtful walk, Kara finally arrived at the training ground. He's glad because of the emptiness of it and sat down reading the book. The handseal is "Boar -> Moneky -> Dragon -> Ram -> Dog" as Hero tried his best to remember it. From the book's description it says that the user only have to do this handseal and make the kikaichu bugs spin around them. This technique is strong enough to stop some powerful attack and many even plant some bugs underneath their opponent. Sounds really interesting to him.

Without any further thought, Kara started executing the move. First the boar handseal then monkey after that is boar then dragon, next is ram and finally dragon. He channeled his chakra then release fifty bugs out of his body which attempt to spin around him at a high speed. But as expected, it didn't work as planned. There's nothing he can do about it except keep on trying and trying until he succeed. Maybe there's a key somewhere but he needs to really try more. Like the wise ones once said, practice makes perfect.

Kara glances at the blue clear sky, he loves the temperature in the morning which is why he decided to train at this time. The clear weather got him thinking again. The dream is too realistic and it posed a greats question, what would he do if he was the boy? Would he rather give the best shot he had and die a brave ninja's death? Or will he beg for mercy and retreat with his tail between his legs? In this day and age, the former is generally the more popular choice. Within Suna, there's the thing called Will of Fire standing for the unwavering will and bravery of ninjas being born in the land of Sand. Maybe that's the point, to fight to his death. But it never worked out did it? Known historical figures like Nashua and Xzelaxer all died going into battles that they knew they were not going to win. Ninjas like Viper and Echo survived that destruction knowing that they couldn't win but look at where they are now, they can now fight bravely knowing that they'd win. Maybe, just maybe, it's better to be a coward.

The more he think about it, the more he realize that it's better to live as a coward. There's a thin line between loyalty and stupidity. History shows that being loyal won't get you far. Not once have a loyalist made it far into the history book. When you think about the past, you think about guys like Near and Zachariach, those who have made major impact in the shinobi world and they're not exactly loyalist. And thus, he asks himself what's the point of being brave? It's normal for a ninja to die in a mission, most of them being loyal to their village not revealing any secret information they're assigned to. And then what happened? They get listed as a 'deceased ninja' and that's it. Some of them made it in the book and all that is worded is "Brave ninja who died in a mission" and that's all. Is that enough to sacrifice their life for, leaving their family behind? Some would even considered those ninjas as incompetent. So why, why die when you can live? Beg for mercy, sell your village out, become their insider or whatever. By choosing to live, you're not gonna give up on the game and continue. But continuing, there's more chance to succeed what you originally aimed. Live to see another tomorrow and change that tomorrow. Cry if it's hard to endure, hide if you don't feel like living anymore, just beg for another day - that is enough.

He looks into the sky that day, the day that he realized the world's illusion. Dying a brave a ninja's death isn't brave but cowardice because you chose to avoid all the problems ahead, not wanting to live as a traitor. However, living as a coward is actually brave. You decided to ignore everybody's hate and endure every other painful thing so you can live and achieve you goal, that's really brave to me. A cloudy day, it was, and he will never forget that.

Boar handseal, then monkey, then dragon, then ram and finally dog. Insects started flying around him. But again, it ended up in vain. All of his attempts ended up in failure today and he's not even close to completing anything. Kara pulls out the apple, twirl it around his hand a few times hesitating. Oddly enough, he doesn't feel like eating it today although he usually does. He finally takes a small bite and slowly chewed down. After gulping that small bit of apple, he takes a deep breath and toss the apple away as strong as he can which propelled the apple deep into the forest. He clutched the side of his head with both of head then let himself collapse onto the grass below him. Hero spreads both of his arms then pondered while looking into the sky. "What does it mean to be a shinobi?", "What does sinobi lives for?", "What's loyalty?" and "What does the world sought for?". He can't find an any answer.

After several minutes he finally stood up, take another deep breathe before walking away. He gave up on learning the jutsu; It's just not the right time. He has a lot of stuff going on in his mind in which he can't deal with. Dealing with those questions inside his head and learning a B-Rank difficulty jutsu at once is no easy task and there's no way he can do it. Forcing it would only use up his chakra worthlessly, even a stubborn guy like Hero know that much. Hero decided to take a walk around the village.

***

With his arms behind back, he walked through the village. It's just another normal day. The same old man selling vegetables shouting with all his might hoping that he can get some food to put on the table. Men with headband who called themselves ninjas patrolling. The women who are extremely good at bargaining for some reason. Sunagakure no Sato is no rural village but in a shinobi era like this one, of course there's the darkside. He can notice the stress in poeple's face. Some are victims of war, some because of bad rulers. What have the world came to? He tries to put on unique clothing and do unique things otherwise he'd be just another guy with a headband, he doesn't want to be just another ninja, no. He kept telling himself that he's different, that he's someone who is bound to make a major impact in the world. He doesn't know how he's going to do it or whether he's the boy who get killed or the man doing the killing, it doesn't matter. All that matter is, he's not just another ninja. Wars are bound to happen regardless of whatever people say and act. Alliance is nothing but a mere promise used to deceive. Discrimination and hatred knows no end. Someone need to forcefully end this, he might be that guy. The guy to forcefully unify the whole shinobi universe under the same banner, place a strict obligation and end war altogether. Kaguya did the same thing and it worked. He might be that guy.

Shoot for the moon so even if you miss you'll land among the stars. He gotta aim big. What does a ninja do? A ninja lives to protect those who can't protect themselves. In a way, they are heroes but heroes don't exist so not so much. Loyalty is dead. There ain't no such thing as loyalty - it's all but an illusion. You will not make big impact while pledging loyalty. And the world sought for peace, for happiness and joy. Is it better to cruelly rid the world of chaos quickly or slowly but nicely rid the world of chaos? Like it or not, the former is better.

Having found his answer, Hero returns to his training this time more focused and determined than ever. He knows that power rule this world and the only way to get things done is by having power. Sure he can talk and wish all he want but in the end, it can only be settled with fists. And his current fists can't beat any sense into people.

Finally arriving at the training ground yet again, Kara takes his stance. He have repeated this many times by now and almost remember the handseals exactly. Boar -> Monkey -> Dragon -> Ram -> Dog and out came the insect from his pore. They started circling around him, trying to create a shield to protect him. The quantity however isn't all that much to boast about better yet impressed of. The technique is far from being completed. But he promises to himself that he's going to learn it at all cost. They say the best offense is the best defense and to a certain degree, it's true. But at that moment, Hero realizes the ultimate difficulty of this move. It's a B Rank jutsu for a reason and to learn it in one day is already plenty difficult to pull off. This is, by no mean, a jutsu that can be learned after fixing a few things and and managed to somehow miraculously pull it off in a few hours. All he can do is to keep on doing the same move over and over again until he learned it.

The sun that was once giving off a warm cherishing the organism beneath it changed into a scorching heat ball which spawn upon heat great enough to force human life form to retreat into a shelter. The tree branches shadow upon the rather short grass beneath it - the same grass that used to sway as the wind arrived which now won't move an inch due to it's absence. Kara's drenched in his own sweat as they fell across his temple, some even dropping off onto the grass beneath him which eargerly soak it in as if he have been searching for liquid for a long period of time. Kara's knees met the grass twice out of exhaustion but both time he gathered up his strength to stand up again. Although there was sound of birds chirping unpleasantly due to the heat, Hero's own breathe drowned all these voice as all he could feel right now is his body screaming for this to stop. Sometimes he stop for a minute or two to bend down, rest his arms on his knee then breath heavily. He allowed his lung to take in as much air as he can to ease up his body which also enduring the agony known as exhaustion. The sun is no longer in the middle of the sky as it's almost right at the end of the sky in the west and Kara is still standing trying to learn the same move he have been doing ever since dawn. Birds come ago to peck on the four apples that he have long finished and now lying on the grass about three meters from him. But then again, he couldn't notice that too.

To his delight, he can finally notice a major improvement in this jutsu and his instinct told him that it's almost finished. He told himself to keep his cool and after such a hard work, he can't relax now. Anything can happen at this point, this jutsu may stay unfinished no matter how hard he try and all his effort would ended up in vain. He can't recall how many times he have practiced this jutsu. He can't recall how many times his body screamed for him to stop out of exhaustion and hunger. He can't recalled the last time he can feel at ease. It's partly because he didn't count how many times allt hose happened but even if he did, he still wouldn't be able to keep track. This attempt still ended in a failure and after two more he finally did it. The bugs swirled around him in rapid motion and he finally felt at ease. The bugs circling him act as if they were congratulating him on his accomplishment. Again, he can't recall how many time he have been inside this circle of bugs but as far as he can tell, this is the first time he feel safe and content inside it. It feels as if nothing can touch him.

Kara canceled the jutsu and let his body collapse backward onto the grass. He almost regret doing it because he can feel his back hurting and maybe he should of let his body fall gently but even if he can travel back in time before collapsing, he would still do the same. This have been the action his body wanted him to do for a long time now and for countless of times as well. To him, nothing is better than this feeling of completion and finally being able to rest himself. He gazes into the sky, although it hasn't even been a day, it feels as if he haven't looked at the sky for a very long time. The genin can see birds flying in the sky dancing freely as if to boast of their freedom. Perhaps, some of those birds are hawks, he can't tell. Speaking of which, was their birds earlier that pecked his apple, if only he had known he wouldn't take another bite at it. It's disgusting now that he think about it. Ah and come to think of it, was their sound of bird chirping? He couldn't believe how he missed all of those. It's better now that he can finally notice all these things. All these exhaustion slight discourage him never to train ever again and only lie down and eat. Maybe, that's for the best after all. But he dismissed that thought instantly. The world isn't going to take care of itself, someone will and that someone will never show up if we all keep praying. He has to. For the sake of the world. The more he think about it, the more he wonder what he's missing. He knows he's missing something that he wanted to do for awhile now. Oh yeah, now that he thinks about it thoroughly he finally remember it. He needs a rest. A long and good one.

(WC-3,250 Claiming Insect Cocoon and Insect Sphere Also +20? stats