The light may dim, but it is never extinguished(p)

"I highly doubt anyone could do better than this one."  Akashingo stated while patting Aki on the head.  "Besides, I am not hungry at the moment.  I am sure I will make it around your house sometime soon, but for now I think a walk.  Come along."  With that Akashingo had turned.

He had given his son a slight bow, to acknowledge his presence, he had nodded slightly at his daughter in law.  However, inside of him.....a frustration was had.  This man in front of him, his son.  A greater disappointment could not have been had.  That ridiculous mustache, those robes....he might as well been born a woman.  If he had trained half as much as worrying about his appearance he might have almost been acceptable, or at the very least died on the battlefield before all this.

His back to his "family" he led Aki away.  Luckily it was when they had crossed beyond earshot that his stomach let out a diffenative growl.  "Well ok, maybe I am hungry."  He said winking at Aki.  "Why don't you pick the food and the place and lead the way."

As they walked and he was led to whatever sweet delicacy that Aki wished for the clouds hovered slowly over head.  The sun was shining, and the clouds were having the great golden orb play peek a boo with the village below.  As they walked Akashingo kicked off his sandals and put them in a nearby trash can.  If Aki gave him a quizzical look he would simply respond "Never liked shoes much.  Don't know why....just never did."  As if this was a totally normal thing to do.  

His eyes would never rest as they picked up every detail, every person who passed, the state of the buildings, the way the villagers held themselves.  Call it training instinct, but he prided himself in knowing his surroundings.  The people seemed generally happy, and the village in fine shape.  A much better setting than the bandit camp he had recently inhabited.  He didn't think his back would ever feel the same again after the hard ground.

They would either walk in silence or, he would answer any question Aki might pose.  If it was silence it wasn't one of discomfort, but instead of relaxation and enjoying the warmth of the day.  He hoped his presence invited question asking, as he didn't mind the talks.  His strides were long and even, his posture once again showed nothing but self assurance.  He did not have to pretend to be someone else, he knew who he was.  The members of the clan often twisted the vision of their duty.  Thinking it was all about appearances, however Akashingo knew better.  It wasn't what was on the outside, but the inside.  What they committed to the clan, the real contributions that they could make.  Something his son had not learned.  Instead he had taken the values and twisted them as so many had.  Feeding off one another, making the trunk of the tree weak.  He hoped he was wrong.....however something was coming even if it was only a feeling.

As they continued down the streets several young ladies caught his eye, and with utmost self control he attempted to deter his vision, though he might have let his eyes linger to long on several occasions.  Shaking his head, he worked harder on looking forward.  Cursing himself inward he did his best to control his vision.  A vice is a vice, but one must know how to control themselves.  In an attempt to prevent such a thing from occurring again, he would ask a simple question.  This would of course happen after Aki had asked any of her own.  "So Akihanna Akari, what is it you would like to do as you grow older?"

Most females had but one ultimate path.  However, it was not the path all had to take.  His mind drifted back in time, just for a moment to the Black Light.  She had worked with him on some missions, she had been an enforcer just has he had been.  Though Akashingo prayed......Akihana would not follow that course.

Akihana felt a slight dusting of pink brush across her cheeks as her grandfather patted her head, his big fingers pushing one of her pigtails out of place and for once, no one could say anything because he himself didn't seem to care. In fact, as they moved away from the rest of the family, Akihana studied the man carefully. Very little about him in general seem to fit the image of the family her parents and sister had constructed over the years for her to follow. He was not immaculately dressed, far from it. And when he took off his shoes and tossed them aside, the blonde couldn't help but let out a giggle. For a bold moment, she considered doing the same but then bashfulness overtook the teen once more, making her focus on the task at hand instead.

"There's this little stall that sells dangos," she informed him happily, still holding on to his hand but now leading him to the cluster of shops and stands selling various foods and drinks. "There's a nice lady who sells them and she always puts extra sweet sauce for me," she added, guiding her grandfather merrily to the stand and waving at the attendant. "If its alright we can just take those and eat them while we walk, I can show you the offices where father works, and the playground, and outside the compound where there's the jounin training ground, and the archives." Not even aware of how much she was speaking, the teen was simply glad to finally have the opportunity to speak her mind at all. For the first time in forever, she was leading someone instead of being lead. And though eh was too young tor realize it at the time, Akashingo had begun laying the foundation of confidence in the little girl.

When he asked if she had any questions, the young blonde canted her head to the side, wondering which one to ask first. "Why were you gone so long?" she asked, a thoughtful expression on her face. "Oka-sama said the last time you were home was when Senritsu-neysan was born... She said you didn't come to see me." There was no accusation in her voice, merely curiosity.

The girl listened quietly as he explained his reasons for the absence before nodding and continuing on. When he asked what she wanted to be some day, the genin paused, genuinely baffled at the question. No one had asked her what she wanted to be. Of course she knew what she wanted to be, but that was only because everyone had told her what it was she wanted. There were few things an Akari woman could be and Akihana had no problem following in the footsteps of those women, but now that someone had asked... the blonde felt as if the question warranted a different answer, not one she would have been expected to give.

"I don't know yet..." the medic in training replied, hesitance and uncertainty clear in her tone. "I mean, I know I must help the clan but... I want to do something that would make people remember me. I don't know how to make that happen but I don't think I'd like it if I was just another name in the clan history books, even if it is an honour to be in the books," she amended hastily. Where this need for recognition had suddenly come from, even she couldn't explain to herself. But watching her grandfather had made her realize that perhaps she too deserved things like praise and acknowledgement. At least a little bit.

(603 words)

At her suggestion, Akashingo nodded and allowed the girl to lead him to the stall she had mentioned.  At each suggestion he smiled and nodded so that she could continue.  Her excitement was what made the walk fun, instead of just another boring walk in ceremony.  Ceremony was what one often did when they had gained position, and how boring of a walk that was.  Youth had been when Akashingo had truly lived, and now as his role was shifting more and more into the bureaucracy of the clan, he found himself longing more for the days gone by.  

Her initial question was not one he had really expected.  Often times he wasn't asked where he was, instead it was always assumed he had reason to be there.  Which of course, he did but still to be asked for once was different.  "The last time I was in this village was indeed when your sister was born.  Some time ago now........"  His eyes moved out of focus for a moment as he remembered.  Seeing that babe in the arms of his son, not feeling the emotions he knew would have been proper.  He had made himself an accomplished member of the family....but as a father, a grandfather........he knew in his heart he had failed at those roles.  Age allowed him to see that now, but pride and his own feelings prevented the mending of these feelings.

However in this little girl, a little blonde who looked so much like him....perhaps just maybe he could do something right.  "I left the day after your sister was born.  I had a mission to do.  It took me all the way to Yukigakure, the land of snow.  A cold place.....not somewhere I would recommend traveling to."  As they walked he thought about how to amend the story.  The details flooding in front of his eyes as each moment began to enter and leave his minds eye.

  "A group had plotted to do damage to our clan.  When I arrived and was accepted into their group, it took me a long time to learn what I needed to know.  All the while, from the inside I delayed their plans, I pushed them to make wrong moves while I attempted to find every peace of the puzzle."  His tone became slightly more serious as he continued, the blood on his hands still felt fresh to him despite the years that had passed.  "It is simple to take a life as a ninja.  It is simple to see your enemy as a beast that simply needs to be put away.  Something you should remember, is each of these individuals has a family, a wife, a child.....some even a great granddaughter."  He gave her had a slight squeeze in recognition of his last word. 

"This means, when we do our duty to the clan, we must know in our heart.....that it is the only way.  Once you begin to doubt that, there is no way clawing your way out.  I have seen many a good man lost to grief and shame for their actions.  When you have to make the hard decisions someday......I hope you will have my confidence in your actions, and know what you have done is right."  A slight cough caused him to realize he had begun to ramble and loose the story in his own musings.  A harder and harder habit to break as he got older. 

"But anyway, to ensure the job was done right it took me all over the world.  Seeing the group as a whole instead of a small group.  I had to find the source of where their power and finance came from.  Years to gain trust and position.  Finally, I had made it to where I wanted to be.  Then the news of the funeral reached me, and I had to cut it short.  I protected the clan, but I hope I did enough."  17 years of his life gone to a mission, and he still worried he had not given enough.  In his mind he laughed slightly at himself and the foolishness of that moment.  All the same, was there any other way? 

They would arrive at the stall as Akihana begun to answer his question on what she wanted to be.  He listened to her answer.......and it reminded him of his own youth.  He had been thrust into this life, but as he had shouldered the burden the fact his name became widespread has given him a great deal of joy.  She desired something similar, he could hardly fault her.  Had she been born male, the options would be clearer.  Perhaps he could finally have had the successor he had so desired.  Yet, his blood was obviously flowing through her veins, and the world was more open to her than some with the right whisper in the proper ear. 

"Akihana, wanting recognition is not a sin.  As our light burns bright, it causes the light of the clan to burn brighter as well.  We must be careful though, for the candle held up close may burn greater than the sun, but that does not mean it is brighter."  Thinking on his next words carefully he continued, "Whatever you decide to do.....I will support you though.  When you decide what it is you want, come and see me and we will make sure you are the best at it."

He smiled at her again.  He had known her but for a few hours, and yet he could see her entire life before his eyes.  It was obvious how she had been raised, and it was clear to him her desires.  In his heart, he prayed that this might be the one light that held the darkness of his sins at bay a little longer.  The death of his friend, the things he had done.....how they begun to weigh heavily on his heart and yet here was an individual who gave him hope, that perhaps everything that he had done......was indeed good.  For without his actions would she be standing here, talking to him and about to enjoy a sweet treat of life.

As they moved through the line, he reached for his money, and looking at Aki he simply said "Why don't you order for me, I trust your judgement."

The young genin listened intently as he recounted his journey to Yuki, a place she had only read about. It had snow, she knew that much from geography scrolls. Akihana had never seen snow in the land of fire and the concept greatly fascinated her. To have something so cold and flufly falling from the sky seemed almost like magic to the young blonde, as did her grandfathers' stories of the secret organization he had infiltrated. It had taken him seventeen years on the mission, making Akihana respect the man anew. Until now, missions just seemed like short errands to the girl, things like finding cats and picking herbs. But her grandfather clearly had done and lived through things far dangerous than any other ninja and this made Akihana proud to walk beside him.

"I don't like hurting other people..." she confessed after he was done with his tale. The teen hadn't said anything while he was talking both because it would have been rude to interrupt and also because she had been too focused on his words, but what he said about all the dead people having families resonated deeply with her. The simple confession she made was one she had yet to make to anyone. Not her family, not her sensei, no one. "Everything they talk about using medical ninjutsu to hurt someone... I have a weird feeling inside," she explained, her free hand gesturing to her tummy. "Like I'm going to be sick. I know ninja aren't supposed to feel that way and I'll try to not be like this but at the moment, I do."

It had taken a lot of courage for her to confide to Akashingo but the blonde felt he might understand, or at least be kind about it even if he disapproved judging by what he'd said earlier. "I also get scared sometimes. Do you ever get scared on missions, Oji-sama? Even one time?" Her brown eyes searched his golden ones, trying to find an answer. Of course men weren't supposed to be afraid of anything, it was common knowledge. But still, he might tell her the real truth or at least the reason behind it. "All the shinobi and kunoichi at the academy are always being told to not be afraid to hurt or get hurt. But I don't understand how everyone else can manage it. I tried to not be afraid but it doesn't work." Akihana slumped her shoulders defeated. Perhaps she really was a terrible ninja.

As they arrived at the stall and Akashingo suggested she order for him, a slight smile lit up her features, bringing her out of her contemplative train of thoughts. "Okay, you can try my favorite flavor," she offered with a small grin before turning to the attendant.

"Two sticks of dango with honey sauce please, and extra sauce for my grandfather. Oh and can we have two mochi too, with coconut and sugar filling, please."

Once their food had been wrapped and handed to them, the pair once again began their walk, this time towards the gates of the compound and into the village beyond. Akihana walked in silence for a moment, taking a bite of her mochi and chewing thoughtfully before she looked up to the man beside her, earnest brown eyes studying his features as she spoke once again. "Are you going to leave Konoha again."

(565 words)

Listening to his young relation, he gave her his utmost attention.  Each thing she said, he could tell was important, and it was clear this was not something she said without difficulty.  Her other words had flown together, had obviously moved from thought to voice without trouble.  Now however, she obviously thought greatly on what was to be said.  It made him glad that already he had inspired confidence in her to speak to him.  

He waited, letting the silence push her to get all her thoughts out before he answered.  He stopped walking briefly, and knelt down to look into her face at her level.  The breeze blowing, causing his air to be ruffled by the wind, the blonde and gray swirling together.  "Do you want to know a secret?"  He asked and when he saw a nod, signal that she did he continued.  "I don't like hurting people very much either.  I really don't.....It is something that I have to do though, or people might hurt us.  I cannot allow that to happen, and so I do what I must.  However.......it has never left me that this is something I wish needn't have to happen.  You are wise to have these thoughts Aki, because when we forget that the people we hurt are indeed people, we become animals."  

Standing, he looked the other way, hiding his face.  A tear had rolled down his cheek, a moment of weakness he had not expected.  Her face had shifted in his vision at that moment, he saw in that moment........he had remembered a young boy from not so long ago.  His young face, the fear in his eyes, the darkness as it consumed those eyes.  The blood on the edge of his own knife that had caused such a thing......an accident, a miss understanding....yet it had happened all the same.  A deep breath and the feeling was gone, no trace left as training repressed his weakness.

"I am afraid on every mission I go on Akihana.  I am afraid every time I step outside this village, that it will be the time I don't come home.  It is not death I fear, but the prospect that if I am not here to protect the family, than who will take my position.  Fear is not a sin Aki.....it is when we allow fear to control us that it becomes the sin we wish to prevent."  Standing tall again, he motioned for them to continue to walk.  Inside he was still shaken by that image.  His left hand, the one free from her grasp began to tremor just slightly despite himself.  

Arriving, and obtaining their food, he took his first bite just as she asked her question on whether or not he would leave the village again.  Chewing he thought on her question.  The answer was of course yes.....there was not a world where he could retire and maintain his home here.  "Delicious, I obviously made a wise choice in bringing you."  He said motioning to his food.  He spoke with his mouth slightly full, once again........not showing the dignity that perhaps the brother of the head of the clan should display.  Alas, life is full of these little disappointments, and that was one burden he didn't mind shouldering.

"Yes......I will leave the village again, I have no doubt.  It is my duty.  I must do my duty, no mater were it takes me."

At Akashingo's admission of not liking hurting others, Akihana felt a great weight removed from her young shoulders. For most of her life, the young teen had thought that there was something inherently wrong with the way she felt. All outside sources had conspired to comply with her thinking so poorly of herself. She was never the important one, never the one who was best at anything so surely everything she did and felt must be sub par compared to others, including her natural empathy and kindness. But here stood her grandfather, admitting to the same feelings and reluctance to hurt and he was a great ninja. So if he held the same views, surely her own couldn't be that questionable?

Perhaps she was like the family, just not the family she immediately knew of. It greatly reassured the teen to know there was someone like her, someone who had attained both success as a shinobi and been able to escape the often suffocating demands of being an Akari. The love her grandfather showed for the clan was beyond doubt. He had given his life to keep it alive and shining. He had simply done it on his own terms.

The kunoichi blushed slightly as he praised her selection of food, her soft brown eyes glimmering with happiness. "We can try a different place tomorrow if you like," she offered as they walked. "There's a small restaurant at the far east side of the village and it has the best ice cream ever. The owner makes it himself and they always finish out so we'd have to go early."

As they walked, Akihana pointing out landmarks and buildings he likely already know, displaying ehr own knowldge of village geography as well as commenting on her own feelings regarding them ("That's the hospital, thy have a whole new section for training medic nins now. My sensei says they're going to make it so there's one in every team to minimize injuries. And that's the Hokage's building, I never see him though, he must be really busy. And that's the library, its really boring and the librarian is not nice to genin but very nice to jounin, I don't understand why), catching the older shinobi up to what he'd missed in his long absence, or at least doing her best to do so.

When she finally summoned the courage to ask the question that had been gnawing at the corner of her mind, she wasn't surprised when her grandfather said yes, he would be leaving the village again. From here on, it would only be a question of how soon. Deep down, she knew he had to leave. Important ninja like him couldn't always stay home. And just because she would miss him didn't mean she should expect him to stay.

"Will you at least come back for my birthday..?" the teen asked timidly.  "Please grandfather."

(484 words)

Their journey continued winding through the sprawling village.  His young companion making conversation about each building, its purpose and her particular view on it.  This had changed, most of the village had seemed to be upgraded, built upon.  Though the world was like this, humans were the ones who were more worn down by age.  While around them the old was destroyed or made new again.  Almost a sad state of affairs if one stopped and truly wondered about it.  For the most part, Akashingo remained silent and allowed Akihana talk to her content, sometimes in this life what one really needed, was just the opportunity to speak without fear.

She had invited him for food tomorrow, and his thoughts drifted momentarily towards the future.  He had scheduled to meet with his brother tomorrow.  Scheduled to meet his nephew for the first time, he was looking forward to seeing his brother again.  Even if age didn't seem to be treating his older brother as nicely as it had treated himself.  

"We could....tomorrow I have to meet with my brother, and his son Masato who I have not yet met.  I meant to see him at the funeral, but alas all things we plan for rarely come to fruition.  Would you like to accompany me?"  Again, he gave the question in his specific way.  An honor though it was perhaps, he completely left the decision up to her.  No hard feelings no matter her decision.  "Of course if you would rather not spend it with dusty old men I understand."  He added smiling, eyes twinkling in the sun.

Their journey continued until she asked a question he knew he didn't have an answer for.  It sounded like such a simple question, such a simple responsibility he should be able to attend.  Yet, he knew in his heart such an answer....an answer as easy as yes was harder to give than she could ever know.  How many birthdays had he missed of his own son, his wife.  He had not even been present for her funeral. 

Finishing his food, his eyes scanned the sky..."For you, I will attempt to move a mountain from my path to return.  I can't promise for sure......but I will do my best.  I am afraid that is all I can offer you, as little as it is."  A pang of guilt was felt in his heart.  Even this statement was optimistic to the extreme.  Yet, to say no and turn her down, it was just something he had not been capable of. 

The sun was making its way through the heavens, Akashingo was unsure how much time had passed.  Hours had flown by, and now he knew he should be returning Aki home, and probably visiting with his "family".  Though, the prospect of such a thing was less than enticing.  As they were walking he spotted a familiar part of the wall surronding the village.

"Do you like to fish Aki?"  Depending on her answer, he would lead her to the wall, and behind several buildings.  Through a narrow ally that Akashingo tighter than he remembered they finally came to a spot that had been left unchanged.  Moving a large wooden pallet a hole could be discovered.  "Up for an adventure?"  he asked, smiling wide.  Once again revealing that crooked grin absent a few teeth, though he attempted to look as welcoming as he could.

At the invitation to join him for dinner with the clan head as well as her second cousin, the young Akari let out a surprised sound, her small mouth forming into an "O" as if she had misinterpreted her grandfather's words. Of course the young blonde knew of such meetings. Important events transpired following such small gatherings of important people. Akihana knew of them in the way all little children of the clan knew of the vast and mysterious workings of the grown ups but never had she been invited to such an affair. Not just her, even Senritsu hadn't been invited so such meetings. The girls were generally led to believe they had no place in meeting rooms and on council tables, the matters of the clan better left to its male heirs.

"I would be honored," the genin replied, the red now prominent on her pale cheeks as she followed Akashingo through the village. At his quip about spending time with old men, the girl let out a small giggle. "Masato-san isn't old," she informed him with a grin. "He's even younger than me. He spends a lot of time in Father's office." Her face fell however when he said he wasn't certain if he would be there for her birthday, the beginning if disappointment seeping into her expressions. Akihana hadn't even realized she would be disappointed until he had confirmed that the best he could do was try. But the kunoichi knew he was very busy, too busy to attend things like birthdays and other family occasions. She wondered if he ever got lonely being away from everyone but figured it wasn't right to just ask.

"Do you like to fish Aki?"

"I've never tried..." the blonde replied honestly, her brown eyes wide at the prospect of learning something new. But to her surprise her grandfather wasn't taking her to a pond or a steam. Instead they found themselves in an alley way Akihana knew of only in passing, never having ventured there before. But today she did, following the older man's lead as they made their way through the narrow space until they arrived at a what looked to be a dead end. The teen's eyes grew wider when her grandfather removed a wooden pallet to reveal some sort of exit or entryway built into the stonework.

When Akashingo asked if she was up for an adventure, a grin identical to his own lit her face. Both their smiles may have been different, his more masculine and missing a few teeth while hers decidedly shy and with sparkling pearly whites on display, but in that instant, she could feel what made her related to the man she had met today. They both had the same spark of adventure in them

Pulling the black ribbons free of her pig tails to let her soft wavy hair loose down her shoulders, the girl used the ribbons to fashion the usual hand bindings she wore during training, securing the pieces of cloth in place before turning to him. "Lead the way."

What happened next was a private adventure between two separate generations of Akari.  Age and youth, spending time together and learning about one another.  This would mark the first meeting of Akashingo Akari and his granddaughter Akihana Akari. A relationship that had seemed to start from nothing, and yet would burn bright for the rest of their lives.  Not to say their weren't trials, because neither could know the future hardships they would both endure personally, and as a clan.  Hours would pass in the blink of an eye, and before either would know what had happened they would find themselves in front of Akihana's home late into the night.

The stars shown brightly, twinkling as if they approved of the nights events, a warm breeze blew in from the south, and the hooting of owls could be heard in the distance.  "Well, I think that is enough adventure for one evening, though I suppose we are well into the night now."  He looked down and smiled at his granddaughter.  He knew he himself looked like a mess.  Clothes torn by branches and mud splattering across his front and knees from crawling on the ground.  A few stray twigs and leaves stuck in his closely shaven beard.  "It is time to end the night.  Though we will see each other soon, if of course you still wish to come with me tomorrow...err later today."  He laughed a little realizing the time.  Kneeling he would embrace his granddaughter if she allowed it.  He would then stand and offer one last smile before turning and beginning to walk down the street towards his own small home.

He had buried one member of his family, and met another in that single day.  Hours had passed, and yet the joy of decades, even generations had been placed in his heart.  These thoughts, emotions swirled within his mind....until a single whisper infiltrated his mind and just like that was gone again.  "7475, Shinrin Akari...traitor"  No doubt one of the numerous agents of the Akari, a simple passing of a message.  Eyes closing he felt a deep sigh escape his lips.  Work....it was never over.  Even in the presence of so much joy, there was still blood on his hands.  Yet the family continued to ask for more. 

Looking down he saw wrinkled hands, beginning to bend with arthritis.  In a puddle that remained on the ground, he saw an aging face...lines that had nothing to do with age, but instead with weariness.  He had taken a vow, he could never stop his duty, and yet this night had for the first time in his career made him wish he could.  To be near Akihana, what risk did that put her in when traitors still lived.  His right hand moved to his face, and combed through his beard.  Fingers gripping the twigs and leaves that had been a symbol of fun he cast them onto the ground.  Shaking his head his course was diverted down a different road.  

Sending another member of the family to the light of the after life it seemed.  His feet seemed heavy as they moved, but with the resolve of a soldier he trudged forward.  One day this would all be over...one day.  He had to believe that in that moment, because if he didn't....there was no way to continue the work that only he could do.

(exit)